A Fuller Understanding

The New Job

2010-10-22T20:10:00.003-07:00

I hope that, by now, anyone who is still poking their noses 'round here from time to time just to see if there's anything new (or are subscribing to a feed) are also connected to us on Facebook (or are actually talking to us in person once in a while). I'd hate to think I left anybody hanging for an extra month before getting around to sharing the news, but yes, I have a new job.

I started four weeks ago, at a funky little software shop called Partnerpedia. By little, I mean about five times the size of my previous employer but still small enough to feel cozy and fun. And by funky I mean the staff is on the young side and some of them even have pretty good fashion sense. I don't know, at least compared to me. And some of them even develop on Macs. Weirdos.

So far it's been great. I had to hit the ground running, developing new functionality on a platform I wasn't too familiar with for a new release of a proven project for a fairly big client. The new release has to be out November 4, so there wasn't a lot of cushion for learning at a slow pace. I had specifically said in the interview that I was good at picking things up quickly, so both they and I are now glad I wasn't just joshing. Earlier this week I was asked if I might be able to work an extra day on the weekend (I could just hear Bill Lumbergh..."I'm gonna need you to go ahead and come in on Saturday..."), but by the end of the day today it was clear that wasn't going to be necessary, since I had everything pretty much wrapped up and ready for testing.

Did I mention they have testing at this place? Like with actual requirements and test plans and people paid just to do QA. First class all the way!

So I'm enjoying it. Not missing the old place too much. Not that I'm bitter or anything...

Anyway, all told I was out of work three and a half weeks. That qualified me for one week of Employment Insurance, but it still puts a pretty big dent in our finances. Stay tuned though, because it turns out we might have enough air miles to take a little trip back to Minnesota for free next summer! Anybody in Minnesota still remember us...?

The First Day of School - Toby

2010-09-07T16:01:00.003-07:00

Toby started Grade One today! Let's ask him about it.

So Toby, how was the first day of Grade One?
Boring.

Really, what did you do?
Everything was boring.

But what did you do in school?
We had carpet time and we decorated our names.

Who is in your class that you are already friends with?
Jonah, Isabella, Victor...

Anyone else that you like?
Not really.

Did you make any new friends?
No.

What's your teacher's name?
I always forget, you know that!

Oh, sorry. It's Mademoiselle Chung. Is she nice?
Yeah. Whatever.

Do you like her?
No, not really.

Why not?
I don't know.

Okay. Well, you didn't stay at school very long today, did you?
It was like sixty hours.

Did your teacher speak French or only English?
It was all French, but I pretty much understood.

So tomorrow's going to be your first day staying at school for the whole day, right?
Yeah. I would pretty much hate it.

Staying at school all day long?
Yeah. And now could you stop writing this email?

It's a blog.
Well then could you stop writing this blog?

Pretty soon. What do you want in your lunch tomorrow? It's your first school lunch ever.
Hummous, pretzels, and...

Carrots?
Carrots? Yes, carrots.

Okay.

The First Day of School - Alicia

2010-09-07T12:36:00.003-07:00

Alicia started a new preschool today. Let's ask her how it was.

Alicia, how was your first day of school today?
My ballet class?

Well it wasn't really a ballet class, was it?
No. Let's just call it a ballet class.

Okay. So did you like your new ballet class?
(nods)

What did you like about it?
Playtime and snack.

Ah, okay. What else did you do?
Art and calendar.

Oh, what do you do for calendar?
Put what the weather is and choose what month.

Okay. What was the weather today?
Rain.

Who else is in your school?
There wasn't anyone else in my school.

No one else?
No.

Were there other kids?
No. Only me and Cruz and the girl that my teacher has.

Her daughter?
Mm hmm. Only my teacher's daughter and me and Cruz.

Do you remember her daughter's name?
No.

What's your teacher's name?
W.S.K.

W.S.K.? Does that stand for something?
No. (laughs)

Do you know your teacher's real name?
(shakes head)

So what was your favourite thing that you did in preschool today?
Snack and play.

And you played outside?
Played outside and inside.

What did you do outside?
Play.

Play what?
Soccer. Bubbles and soccer.

Cool. So, are you excited about going back tomorrow?
Yes!

First Day of School - Michelle

2010-09-07T12:25:00.002-07:00

Michelle started teaching at a new school today. Let's ask her how it was.

So how was class today?
Pretty quiet.

How many students did you have?
Zero. But one person popped in because she wanted to take class there.

Okay. And do you have a whiteboard or anything to write on in your classroom?
No. But I brought some of my own paper.

Do you know anything about having students tomorrow?
It's unlikely that I will have students tomorrow.

Why?
It'll just take time for students to get registered. They didn't have the location registered with the testing agency in time.

What about the whiteboard?
One of the managers said that she would get it ordered. I gave her a whole list of supplies that I wanted and she said it would get ordered. She said I should have the supplies tomorrow. And she did say that she hoped I would have the whiteboard before I have students.

So how do you feel about your job so far?
Um, today I feel better than I did this weekend. The manager that just got back seems more competent than the one I've been dealing with. I'm just excited to have students soon. Someday.

So what do you do at work until you have students?
I study French and make copies and I will be making some more brochures to hand out to advertise the class.

And your building doesn't have a copier but you have access to another building.
Yeah, I have to go somewhere else to make copies. But they said that I could have a small copier when I have students. It sounds like they're going to equip me eventually.

So you didn't give anybody a piece of your mind today?
No. I didn't.

Can I tell you something else that happened today?
Sure.

One of the childcare workers was going down the hall looking for someone to show pictures to, so I stood in the hallway for 15 minutes looking at pictures of a bunch of people at a wedding getting fed. Tons of pictures of the bride and groom getting fed sweets.
Interesting.

Not really. Somewhat. They made a picture out of coloured rice though, I thought that was awesome.
Okay.

Back To School

2010-09-04T10:15:00.002-07:00

It's been an interesting week.

Toby is getting ready to begin Grade One, Alicia is looking forward to a new preschool, Michelle is learning the ropes of a new job, and I'm looking for one.

Last Tuesday, my boss sat me and two of my coworkers down and explained that there was nothing wrong with our performance and this wasn't because of anything to do with us, but there wasn't enough work and payroll had to be temporarily reduced and they expected to hire all three of us back in six weeks. Although the part about there not being enough work for everybody wasn't exactly a surprise, the action being taken certainly was.

Although it's nice to have some reassurance that I might be able to go back to my old job in six weeks, at this point that doesn't really look like the ideal scenario. I'm looking at this as an opportunity to find something better, sooner. So the job hunt is on.

In the meantime, Michelle is jumping into a new job, doing what she does best, teaching ESL to adults. She's also been picking up extra cash tutoring students through the summer, so some of that may also continue this fall. Although there have been some frustrations with how things are starting out in this new position, she is still looking forward to being in the classroom with people who want to learn.

Michelle's also really enjoying me being home, at least so far. It was a little strange how my first day off the job was her first day on, so as she was driving off to work for the day, I was getting the kids breakfast and planning a trip to the park. Instant role reversal.

Our kids are fantastic, ready for school to start but lamenting the end of their summer break. We briefly tossed around the idea of Alicia starting kindergarten this year, but finally opted for a wonderful new daycare/preschool program that's starting up just a few blocks away from our house.

So come Tuesday Dad is going to be packing lunches and dropping kids off at their first day of school while Mom is off at work. It should be a very interesting week, again.

Safe at Home

2010-07-12T21:16:00.002-07:00

Well, we made it through the 17 hours of flights, five hours of layovers and three hours of driving to get back home. We missed our kids a lot while we were in Australia, so it was wonderful to hug and kiss them again. They tried to act like they missed us too, which was nice.

We had a fantastic time in Brisbane, thanks entirely to our magnificent hosts, Alicia and Danny and Sophie. Thanks so much you guys! We saw kangaroos, emus, humpback whales, and even cuddled with a koala bear. He was half-stoned, of course, but it's apparently quite difficult to find one that isn't. Eucalyptus isn't exactly over-the-counter stuff, you know.

And if you're wondering, I made every attempt to go skydiving, but it didn't happen. It was scheduled thrice, but each time the weather didn't cooperate. The third day was looking perfect, the sky was clear blue, sunny and warm, and we had been given the green light. I got suited up, we piled into a plane with no door (me sitting right next to the open side, excited to watch the ground drop away from such a unique vantage point), started rolling down the runway, then the crew started getting some new info about the wind picking up and they called it off at the last second. Rather disappointing. Still, better than jumping and getting blown into some power lines or something.

All the pics of our trip are here, so take a look!

Cheers

2010-07-02T13:40:00.004-07:00

Hello from the other side of the world! Michelle and I are at the halfway point of our two-week vacation in Australia. It's been amazing and we promise to have some pictures and video up on the blog, Facebook, and/or YouTube hopefully not too long after we get back.

So what have we done so far? A lot of relaxing and enjoying the company of our wonderful friends Alicia and Dan and their adorable daughter Sophie. We've kind of been soaking up the local sights and culture without going tourist crazy...we took a beautiful walk in a subtropical rainforest at Mount Glorious on one day, went for lunch at a beautiful beach on another, and yesterday I almost went skydiving. Unfortunately it rained, which kind of ruins that, so that's been rescheduled for Thursday. Everyone keep your fingers crossed.

Of course the real fun of Australia is the people, who are just as friendly and lovely as Canadians without being so annoyingly polite all the time. We've been picking our friends' brains for all the linguistic differences; we have successfully put the pram in the boot rather than putting the stroller in the trunk. I, personally, am in love with the idea of replacing nearly any form of Hello, Goodbye, or Thanks with a simple, "Cheers." I may be saying Cheers for a while after getting home. It will be annoying.

I've also successfully driven on the left-hand side of the road. Have you ever done it? It's strange, but not exactly difficult. It's about as hard as you probably think it would be...as long as you're paying attention, you'll do fine. The steering wheel is on the other side of the car, so it's not really like you're going to forget where you are. The challenge isn't really to keep from forgetting and drifting back to wrong side into oncoming traffic. No, as John Travolta so wisely said, it's the little differences. Your most common blunder when you first drive in Australia will be that you will turn on your wipers when you mean to signal a left turn. You will do this several times before you really catch on. When you actually make the left turn, it will not feel as weird as you might think to turn into the near lane rather than the far one; the real challenge will be to look the right way to make sure no one is coming. You'll be looking to your left and in the near lane, then to your right in the far lane, and then you'll feel like an idiot when you realize it's the other way. Of course, if no one's coming it won't really matter, and if someone is you'll realize the mistake in time, so there's a good chance you won't do anything unsafe, but still. It's the little things that get you. I also found that I have no sense whatsoever of where the car ends on my left side. When I'm driving in Canada I know exactly where the right side of my car is and how to keep it in my lane. You'd think you could translate this pretty easily to the mirror opposite, but it just doesn't happen automatically. My left wheel keeps drifting on to the shoulder if I'm not paying attention. I'm so used to the car's left side being pretty much six inches to my left rather than four feet.

Anyway, that's life in Australia so far. We miss our kids but we know they had a blast this week with Granny Kapp. She flies home to Minnesota tomorrow and the kids will spend Week Two with Nana Lori. Many heartfelt thanks to both our moms from Michelle and me!

Or should I say, mums.

In A New Place

2010-06-19T19:44:00.006-07:00

I'm not sure if anyone is still stopping by anymore. But we are in a new house. This blog has been languishing in obscurity for pretty much one year now, updates few and far between as we try to make sense of life in Canada. Michelle provides childcare, tutors, and is working on her Master's degree. Josh is also studying from time to time in the evening, working on getting Microsoft certified. Our kids are getting older, cleverer, and more incredible all the time.

And honestly, we do a lot of our online interaction through Facebook these days. If you're not friends with us, you should be! That way you can follow our exciting adventures through our status updates and photo albums. It's almost better than a blog!

Almost. But really, it seems like we don't have as much time to post these days. We'll try though. The blog is not dead.

Here's our new house!

We came.

2010-05-13T20:45:00.002-07:00

There are six or seven weeks of school left now. It's the first school year since I was 4 that I didn't have a classroom to belong to. It's been a school year for my kids only. I've switched identities in so many ways this year.

Tonight I met a Korean woman who just might hire me to tutor her daughter English. The man who introduced us had told her that I was an American, but reassured her that during the Olympics I was wearing a Canada sweatshirt. She asked me why I came to Canada. Of course, I answered that it was because my husband's family lives here.

I think I also came because Josh and I never quite felt like we belonged in the US. That's not just about our political leanings. Being a Canadian is about more than not arguing about socialized medicine or not starting wars. And it's more than pronunciation and French immersion schools.

It's been more than 10 months that we've lived here as a family now. In just over three weeks we're actually going to buy a house. Am I glad that we came?

While we lived in the States it was a choice we always thought about. Will we ever move to Canada? When? How? Is it worth it? Now that I'm here, it doesn't feel like choice. I feel so Genesis about it. I feel like I married a Canadian so I live in Canada. It's just where we are. That makes it sound like I don't like it here, which is false. I do like it. But deeper than that, I just think, 'I'm here.' If I needed to spell that out a little more, I'd be forced into a phrase like, 'I feel like I'm supposed to be here.' But that wouldn't be quite the right phrase. Nor would, 'I like living in X country better than living in Y country.' come close to summing it up. I live here. That's just what it is. In general, I could definitely say, I'm opposed to the switching part of all this. The switching part sucks.

Life is good. The various ways to improve life at this point have nothing to do with which country I live in. I have friends. I have community. I have places where I fit. I smile. I laugh. I get too much sun. I drink more wine. And if I do degrade into comparisons, I do think I have more of all that here than in Minnesota. I had deeper friendships in Minnesota, but I also had more time there. Life here will be just fine. I can be a Canadian. In just a few more years.

Love Song

2010-02-14T15:04:00.003-08:00

Toby has composed a song for Valentine's Day. We hope you enjoy it!

Valentine's Day
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
Trumpet time!
…
(trumpet noise)
…
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
We feel loved most on Valentine’s Day!

Everybody knows what Valentine’s Day is for
Valentine’s Day is for
Showing people that you love them
Let’s play the banjo now!
…
(banjo noise)
…
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
Nobody knows why Valentine’s Day comes around
But people do know what’s real and what’s not
Xylophone time!
…
(xylophone noise)
…
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
The song’s almost over
So let me say one more
Don’t forget when Valentine’s Day comes!
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!
Aaaaaaand………..
Tiiiiiiiiime toooooooo doooooooooo theeeeeee
Valentine’s Day Dance!
Drum time!
…
(drum noise)
…
Valentine’s Day!
Valentine’s Day!

What's It Like To Be Here?

2010-02-13T04:15:00.006-08:00

For several months now, this blog has been languishing as we post less and less frequently, our lives being overrun by new schedules and obligations. Simultaneously, our Facebook walls are flourishing. It's much quicker and easier to post quick, pithy updates there as interesting (or conspicuously uninteresting) things happen in life, and frankly, it results in way more comments. So if we aren't friends already, be sure to add us.

However, some things just require the scope and gravity of a blog post, and yesterday the Winter Olympics began in my hometown. How many people ever get to say that, within the entire span of their lives? For all our friends in Minnesota and elsewhere around the world, I feel a duty, nay, a moral imperative, to chronicle this event; to convey what it's like; to transport you here as best I can. So read on, dear reader.

In the past few weeks leading up to the Games, the primary mood among Vancouverites has seemed to be skepticism. We had the warmest January on record, and rumours of dry, barren slopes at Cyprus had cynics fearing the worst. Thousands of protesters have been reminding us for months that the city of Vancouver has what some researchers believe to be the largest population of homeless children in North America, not to mention the sad and horrible problems of drug addiction and mental illness that plague the many homeless residents of the downtown and other areas. The out-of-control problem of homelessness in this city is one of its unfortunate but indisputably central facets.

Couple that with a growing number of embarrassingly underfunded schools, then factor in the usual budget problems of any major city, and you start to understand why a significant number of people have felt it strongly necessary to peacefully protest Vancouver's decision to take on billions of dollars in debt in order to host these Games. The money being spent just on security has outgrown the original estimate for the entire Games. The original budget alloted $175 million for security costs; about one billion has now been spent on security alone.

But none of that matters right now. It's finally time; the Games are here. In the last few days the entire city seems to have caught the spirit at last, and the streets are lined with proud, cheering Canadians, as the torch runs by. We took the kids to see it as it passed through White Rock on Tuesday morning, then yesterday it came right by where I work and we all hurried down the stairs to be there to cheer it on. This was the longest 'domestic' torch relay of all time, apparently. Only makes sense, since we have more land to run across than most. Finally, the city is excited and ready to host the greatest sporting event known to man.

Then Georgian luger Nodar Kumaritashvili was killed near the end of his final training run, just hours before the opening ceremonies yesterday.

I can't explain how deeply I was affected by this. I felt anger, sadness, bewilderment and shame. This from a guy who laughed when his family's dog drowned in the backyard pool twenty years ago. I've definitely changed over the years. When I saw the footage of that accident, I wanted everything to stop. I wanted the torch relay to be halted in respect. I wanted the Opening Ceremonies to be postponed. I wanted to know whose job it was to make sure the luge track was safe, and see that person personally apologizing to Kumaritashvili's family on live television. If that job didn't exist, I wanted to see the organizers apologizing to the family that it didn't. Instead we got two grey-haired men looking very sad on TV for five minutes, stammering that this was a tragedy.

We already knew it was a tragedy, but is it only sad, or is it disgraceful and reprehensible? There had already been "several," we are told, previous accidents during training runs. A former gold medalist had wiped out. A Russian competitor had said the track was dangerous, too fast. Was there no one capable of saying that the track should be closed before someone died instead of after? Or how about at least some netting? Maybe even some pads on the steel poles right next to the track? Between 10 AM yesterday and the time the Opening Ceremonies actually began, I couldn't stop these questions from running through my head.

The luge competition will probably not begin tomorrow as scheduled, but I imagine they will still have it. And Kumaritashvili's family and teammates will receive plenty of condolences, but no apologies. It's almost enough to make me want to join the protesters.

But once the Opening Ceremonies got underway, the excitement was undeniable nonetheless. A grand spectacle as it always is, the Vancouver version featured some amazing musicians and dancers, surrounded by a spectacular, constantly evolving set, creating many incredibly memorable scenes and images. I could almost feel proud to be a Vancouver resident again.

And today and for the next 16 days there will be a lot of cool games on TV. Good competition, friendly smiles, exciting and bizarre sports like curling and the biathlon. Everyone knows the summer games are better, but these ones are at least happening less than an hour away from me, and that will be exciting to know as I watch them on TV exactly like I would any other year. I hope you'll be watching too.

New Things

2010-01-23T13:38:00.002-08:00

Toby has a new loft bed!

And Michelle has new glasses! Even better, Alicia looks so much like her mom when she puts on the old ones.

I don't blog much

2010-01-18T19:27:00.002-08:00

I'm actually busy. Often working on my thesis. But I'm procrastinating now. I turned in the first draft of the first few chapters in mid Dec and I haven't hunkered down again since. Who wants to? Where's the motivation? Even if I work my bum off now, I'll still be lucky if I finish in 2010. So. Okay, soon. Soonish.

When I never blog, where do I start?

Okay, my children. Toby is lovely. He's slightly less in love with his mother than he was in September, but that's progress. He recently told me who he was going to marry from his school class. I don't approve, but what do I get to say?

Alicia is lovely. Yesterday while we were discussing Barbie's breasts, she said that they looked like "bad guy's breasts." I was proud.

I taught my first ever preschool Sunday School class on Sunday. It was a blast! The class meets before church, and I'll be their teacher each week. Complete with a flannel board. I had 4 little kids this Sunday, but there could be more. They are oh so cute! Two out of every five Sundays Josh will co-teach the school age Sunday School class.

This past weekend was Ernie's 60th birthday! We had a party for him, complete with some out-of-town relatives. It was an event that we would have missed if we didn't live here, so I was very happy that we do. The most lovely part for me was figuring out that Josh has a cousin only 4 hours away who has a six-year-old boy who loves Legos and a four-year-old girl. Awesome! It's ideal to have a cousin who comes to your house every morning (Kacia) and a grandpa and uncle who live in your house. But there's also something lovely about having (second) cousins your age whom you can see a few times a year. You don't see them often enough for them to get boring.

Life is good. Toby's best-friend-that-he's-ever-had comes over to play every Monday after school. This is Monday, so that was today. It was a good day.

So Many Movies, So Little Time

2010-01-01T10:20:00.003-08:00

It would seem a whole new year is upon us already. I'm sure many of you dear readers were recipients of our Christmas letter, so I don't need to recount all of the reasons why 2009 was such a remarkable year for us, but as 2010 dawns we find ourselves living in Canada, enjoying the holiday season with family and friends, both old and new. As I write, Toby is wildly shrieking with joy while playing in his room with a friend, Kenny, from his kindergarten class, and I just found out from talking to Kenny's mom that I know his dad from high school. In fact, we commuted to UBC together for a while and were in a car accident together once.

So that might be considered indicative of life these days. Also indicative is how badly the content of this blog has been dwindling, youtube videos aside. From time to time I think of a topic I'd like to expound on, but it doesn't occur as often as it used to and life keeps us busy. But rest assured, we will keep the cute pictures and videos coming, and write a little extra when the occasion arises.

As for today, it has become this blog's tradition on the first day of the year to post the complete list of all the movies I watched in the previous calendar year. This year's list is pathetically short, what with all the moving to another country that I had to do. That's right, I only watched nineteen films in 2009. I suck.

So here they are. In past years I've given each movie a letter grade, but this year you get the best at the top and the worst at the bottom. So it's more of a relative scale than an absolute, which seems somehow more Canadian to me.

I will probably watch more than 19 movies in 2010, but I'm also reading a lot of books now, what with my 90 minute bus ride every morning. And evening. So I might have a book list next year too.

And now, the movies. As always, my value judgments are universally true and binding, above reproach, and will be vigorously defended on request.

Awesome
Inglourious Basterds
Slumdog Millionaire
Watchmen
Gone Baby Gone
Invictus
Lords of Dogtown
Charlie Wilson's War
American Buffalo
Away We Go
Star Trek
The Hurt Locker
Choke
Quantum of Solace
Where In The World Is Osama Bin Laden?
Sicko
Evan Almighty
Where The Wild Things Are
Everybody's Fine
Elizabethtown
Awful

All On A Christmas Morning

2009-12-28T15:42:00.002-08:00

White White Rock

2009-12-15T20:14:00.003-08:00

It's not quite Minnesota, but we got snow this weekend! Toby got some in his ear and...well, see for yourself.

Can You Believe She's Four?

2009-11-28T12:11:00.004-08:00

It was on this day in 2005 that I met the smallest person I would ever know. Our lives changed forever, and for a time this blog had only one topic. Life is a great deal different today than it was on that day and for many months after it, but we are still being blessed and challenged by this girl, often at the exact same time. And we still love to take her picture.

She loves her new Playmobil Hospital!

Not So Scary

2009-11-06T19:44:00.002-08:00

I think you'll agree, Toby and Alicia were sufficiently adorable in their Halloween costumes last weekend.

Toby's kindergarten class:

And our scary jack o'lantern!

Not Exactly Foreigners

2009-11-02T12:55:00.002-08:00

I don't have my car keys today. Yesterday, Josh and the kids were in the car for church long before I left the house. Upon leaving the house, I needed to grab my keys to lock the door. Not having a purse or jacket with me, I left the keys in the car. Josh drove home. My keys are still there.

11:45 today, the kids and I are shoeing up for school. I'm locating my goods and discover my lack of keys. I didn't have to wonder where they were, but only how to get the kids to their different schools.

Oddly enough, I think I actually have more options here about how I might alternatively get my kids to school than I did in Minnesota. Our friends were much more spread out in Minnesota. Here, there are at least three moms in Toby's class that I can call. Only one mom in Alicia's class that I have a phone number for, more if I could have found the phone list. And then there's family. There are definite advantages to having four adults in a house. Derek had conveniently stopped home for access to his larger closet, and I grabbed his keys before he left for work. That got Toby to school. A preschool mom picked up Alicia and will bring her home. Toby's friend's dad will bring him home. Viola! Community.

Reprinted For Your Edification

2009-11-01T20:59:00.002-08:00

In Toby's Halloween goodie bag from church this morning, there was a little plastic pinball game involving flicking plastic beads into holes...you know the type. Reprinted here is the full text found on the back of this game. Enjoy.

Intelligent Marble
Intelligence add Lucky
A GAME OF MARBLES

Marble is a kind of game that is very mordern now. It collects exciment fasciration. It's a very interesting game. It can not only trains lover's skill and intelligence but also is a best way for lover to make friends. It's an intelligent game for a family to be a happy field. Spring your miracle, competite your level.

You'll surpass yourself intelligence and skill through a sernies of intelligent competition actions, competite your intelligence and your skill, participate in together plagways. 1. The two parties will judge winning or losing, according to the highest grand total. The one who get the highest grade is a big winner. 2. Before a game begins, players may also engage to shoot the five provided plastic teased pearl early or late, getting the grand total. We winner according to how many points it can reach. Where there is a will, there is a way. The training of will, intellivgence, skill will be your best ladder of success, it is your best training way of defeating everying.

Halloween pics soon.

Being Silly At Breakfast

2009-10-28T20:46:00.002-07:00

Moving Down In The World

2009-10-18T15:18:00.003-07:00

A while back that was my Facebook status, "moving down in the world." Facebook isn't really a substitute for blogging, but it's good for a quick update when there isn't time for a full blog post, which seems to be the case a lot lately.

Anyway, we have indeed moved down, descending to occupy the basement suite of my Dad's house, and it's working out well. We now have easy access to all our stuff, rather than keeping some of it at a storage facility several blocks away. We've acquired some furniture from craigslist, like a kitchen table and the cool toy storage/coffee table thing pictured above. Our books are back in their bookcase, clothes in an actual closet...life is good. I suppose you'd have to ask my brother how he feels about being unceremoniously ejected, but he doesn't get equal time here on my blog. Not that I've been devoting much time to it myself.

So to anyone who still visits, awaiting updates on our new Canadian adventures and more pictures of our cute kids, I apologize again. The dust is still settling, but gradually life is beginning to feel normal. We have moved for the third time in the last 12 months and the last time for another 12 months or so, I hope. Eventually we will want to buy a house, but it's the basement suite for now. The kids are getting the hang of school, Canadian Thanksgiving has come and gone, and Michelle's final year of working on her Master's Degree is well underway. I can still use that last one as an excuse for sparse blogging, since she commandeers the computer most evenings and weekends, but the other excuses are now falling away.

Besides our being newly installed downstairs, we have other news to report. The other three members of my family have all become more Canadian very recently. Michelle now has her official permanent resident visa! She has a Social Insurance Number (Canadian SSN) and is allowed to work now and everything. That's pretty cool, but the kids are even more Canadian than she is...they just got their Canadian passports.

Yes, we are living the Canadian life to the fullest. Last weekend we stuffed ourselves on turkey and pumpkin pie like good Canadians, secretly knowing full well that we would be doing it all over again in a month and a half, because after all, we all still have US passports too. Two citizenships means two Thanksgivings. Just one of those inalienable rights.

So now that I have no more boxes to unpack, visas or passports to apply for, and limited access to the computer, what will I do with myself? Take it easy, you might say. Plop yourself down on the couch and watch some TV. Ah, but that is one thing I will not be doing much of in the near future, because we don't have a TV right now.

Shocking, I know. We sold our TV in Minnesota because it was old and heavy and not worth moving. We haven't picked one up here, because there was no need when we lived upstairs with Dad...just watch his. And when we moved down here? Well, we just didn't bother. Money is a little tight, it's true, but really I think it's more that I just didn't feel like getting one right now. Michelle has always wanted to be without one, why not let her for a while? I think I was just open to, perhaps even curious about, taking a break from it for a while.

Since this happened, several people have seemed to be quite concerned about it. People offer to let us borrow one of their old ones for a while. Relatives talk about it being an anniversary or Christmas gift. I don't know yet. The more people think I need one, the more I feel somewhat resentful of the sentiment. You think I need a TV? I'll prove you wrong. Heck, I never had time to watch the thing when we did have one, did I? And now that I'm in Canada, it's not like NBA games would be on even if we did have one. Everyone here just watches hockey for some reason.

Now, it's not like I'm being a monk about this or something. I still go out to movies with my buddies. And I can always wander upstairs and flip on my Dad's TV if I get bored. Toby and Alicia even have a little portable DVD player they got from Papa John a couple years ago, so they can watch Caillou on that. But our own TV...I think we'll just wait a while. So far I don't miss it.

Someone remind me, when does the final season of Lost start again?

Jokes in the Great Outdoors

2009-09-19T14:06:00.003-07:00

Dad: Toby, come here! Tell me a joke to put on the blog.

Toby: Why did the computer cross the street?

D: Why?

T: Because he didn't have underwear!

All: AHAHAHAHHAHHAHHH!!!

D: Alicia, now you tell me a joke.

A: Why did the kangaroo hop on the chair to the house?

D: Why?

A: Because he didn't have any windows!

All: AHAHAHAHHAHHAHHH!!!

Lately this sort of joke is a common offering from either Toby or Alicia, and always followed by hysterical laughter from both of them. The way they laugh is always funny, even if the joke wasn't.

Uncles and aunts are great audiences for these jokes, and there were plenty of them (uncles, aunts, and jokes) on our hike through Lynn Canyon Park last weekend.

Skipping Church

2009-09-13T08:55:00.002-07:00

Ah. Some space in my life. Everyone has left for church without me. There are so many reasons to skip church this morning. I've got some tea and some Dave Johnson ready to stream online.

We've chosen a church and we've chosen how we'd like to be involved. With such a small church (around 30 adults per Sunday), you don't really get to have a period of time where you just sit around and soak things in. But I really don't want to dive in yet. It surprises me that I feel this way. I'm such an extrovert, but I'm not really ready to embrace new people and new tasks just yet. It's just a part of the process of moving.

There are little things that I'm feeling better about. Like my car. I liked it from the start, but I'm moving into the phase where it doesn't feel like a new car anymore. I can even pull out of the driveway headed in the direction that corresponds to the place where I want to go without thinking about it. Most of the time.

I love Toby's school. It is actually much more diverse than I noticed on first glance. There are at least three children in Toby's class that are already bilingual (Portuguese, Mandarin, Punjabi). I will definitely be friends with the Brazilian mom.

Our budget has been a big change and source of stress for me. We've got about 40% less income than we had in the States AND EVERYTHING is more expensive. Now that we've been here for two and a half months, we've been able to figure what we can and can't afford, and I've made lots of progress in figuring out where I can buy what. Yesterday, I actually bought a raincoat for Alicia at Walmart. AH! I am NOT a Walmart shopper, but I could only find a raincoat at one other store and it was $10 more. These days, I need that $10, so Walmart it was. I'll still keeping trying to avoid it, though.

Just why is everything more expensive in Canada? I can think of a bunch of reasons. Tax. Is it 12% on everything? Gas. ($4.02 per gallon US Dollar) That makes it more expensive to truck things from here to there. Borders. Lots of goods have to cross the border from the States. Shear numbers. Canada has 10% of the population of the US. I'm sure that companies abroad sell their goods to the US for cheaper prices than to other countries. It's really not that things are so expensive here. It's really that life is so cheap in the US. Spoiled brats.

I do miss living in Minnesota for lots of reasons. And it really goes beyond there being any reasons. There's a deep part of my gut that is Minnesota and the US. I absolutely chose to move here, and I would do it again. But until the rest of my being catches up with me, I might be skipping church from time to time.

The First of 2340 Days

2009-09-08T20:10:00.003-07:00

Approximately. And I did my own math. Not Josh.

Toby started school in the rich neighborhood today. Kinda white for my taste, but not entirely. It's a little more than a ten minute drive away.

School today was only 20 minutes long. All the parents stayed. Some children brought two. The rest of the week is only one hour per day. Next week starts with two days of parent conferences and then Toby finally gets to go to a full day of school on Wednesday. Crazy. The days that he only goes for an hour, it's only half the class. It's all an effort to help the teachers get to know the kids well before school really gets underway.

Toby seemed to think that school was okay, but is apprehensive about tomorrow. His mother, the love of his life, doesn't get to stay tomorrow.

Josh is the one who gets to take the bus. But the bus just changed its plan. It doesn't drive all the way into the city any more. Now it drives to a new skytrain line instead. The switch took him about 10 minutes extra this morning. Since his commute by bus is already about 1.5 hours one way, an extra 10 minutes is a bummer. But that's life. We have two cars now, so we've planned for Josh to drive about twice a week and bus the rest for the sake of parking and gas costs and CO2 and all that. We'll see how long that holds.

The best part of the day was deciding on a whim that the first day of school deserved a treat. After some last minute calls, our minivan took us, Derek, and Brianna out for ice cream! Awesome! Can't do that in MN. The uncle and aunt part, anyway.

Happy first day of school Toby!

For The Love Of Movies

2009-08-26T19:52:00.011-07:00

I haven't done a full-fledged movie review in many a moon. Partly because I haven't been seeing many movies for several moons now, and partly because when I do see a movie I see it several moons after its release and everyone else has already seen it and has no need for a review thereof.

I don't know where all these moons came from. Let us dispense with them.

This week I actually saw a movie, and saw it within four days of its release. These facts, coupled with how completely and spectacularly I fell in love with said movie, make it inevitable that I should write my first fully-functioning film review since, I think, Lady In The Water. If I'm wrong, I'm sure my fanatically devoted readers will correct me, if I had fanatically devoted readers, which I'm pretty sure I don't. Bright side: I'm never wrong.

Particularly about movies, and this one is outstanding. This movie comes extremely close to encapsulating everything, and I mean practically everything, that I love about Movies. Film. Cinema.

At this point I should interject, for formality's sake, that the movie of which I'm speaking is Quentin Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. Just on the pretense that you didn't already know.

And so we come to the review. It has five chapters, just like the movie. They are painstakingly and obviously marked, just like in the movie. You see, I bring craft and cleverness to my movie reviews. Just like Quentin Tarantino does to his movies. I do apologize for the ridiculous length, but this is just what happens when I love a movie this much. Deal with it.

Chapter One: The Disclaimer
Many, many people will not like Inglourious Basterds (I.B. for short). Many, many people should not see it. Many, many people have no use for Quentin Tarantino (Q.T. for short), and rightly so. He does not make flawless films. He does not make important, life-changing movies, no matter how much you think Pulp Fiction meant to you at the time. Q.T. makes fun, stylish, kick-ass movies. There is a legend (recounted, I believe, even in Q.T.'s autobiography) that Oliver Stone once said to Q.T., "Someday you're going to want to stop making Movies and start making Films," to which Q.T. replied (I may be paraphrasing), "Never in a million years." Q.T. loves, absolutely, unapologetically, gushingly loves Movies. Movies of all kinds; action movies, cowboy movies, mobster movies, zombie movies, funny movies. Good movies. Bad movies. There is a special place in Q.T.'s heart for Bad Movies, and he puts a little bit of Bad Movie in every one of his exceptionally good movies. In I.B., look for it right at the beginning of Chapter Five.

Now I am the first person to admit that not everyone loves movies just for the love of movies. Not everyone can enjoy a line of truly awful dialogue. Not everyone likes to see a blatant, shameless reference to another movie in a movie. And particularly not everyone likes to see the skin being cut off of a dead body's scalp. So not everyone will like Inglourious Basterds. That's okay.

Chapter Two: The Style
Whenever I start talking about Pulp Fiction or Kill Bill, the first thing I come up against is my frustration at not having a better word than Style to describe what Q.T. does so well. The man just knows movies so well, and loves them so much; his instinct for a scene is impeccable. When to change the camera angle. When the next character makes an entrance, and how. When the music changes, or stops. How long to pause. When the climax suddenly pounds you in the chest, or when it doesn't. I've never said this before; I only just thought of the comparison this instant, but for you music fans, how does this sound? Quentin Tarantino is the Tom Morello of moviemakers. His talent is immense, flagrant and flamboyant, and he shows no shame in its application. What point is there in holding back? There is so much Style in Inglourious Basterds, just like in Pulp Fiction or Kill Bill, that the excess oozes off the screen and forms a puddle around your shoes. Half as much would be more than sufficient, but why stop there?

Chapter Three: The Substance
I.B. tells a great story. Again, Q.T. is not interested in making perfect movies, and the plot has a few holes. On occasion, some tremendous suspension of disbelief is asked of you. Who cares? If you worry about all that stuff, how would it be any fun? But the story, such as it is, more than stands up. It is classic Tarantino; flawed but lovable characters on every side, a tangle of schemes upon schemes, best laid plans surely doomed to fail but still we can hope, can't we, a villain whom we can't help loving, and at the center of it all, as it so often is with Q.T., a woman. The only unflawed character. Q.T. finds heroes uninteresting, but a heroine! A tragic past, the strength to go on, the courage to persevere in a man's world, the key that unlocks the beauty in all the ugliness. On paper she is the most one-dimensional character in the whole movie, because she must be perfect; no flaws. But if she was flat the movie would fail, so as always Q.T.'s only hope is an actress that can truly make her real. In P.F. and K.B. it was Uma Thurman, with sublime performances in both. Inglourious Basterds has Mélanie Laurent. At first glance she is an Uma lookalike, but she brings her own brand of quiet intensity to Q.T.'s latest heroine and does for I.B. exactly what Uma was able to do for Kill Bill.

Chapter Four: The Funny
I will allow correction on this point, but I submit that I.B. is Q.T.'s funniest movie. There is comedy here of all sorts. Slapstick, caricature, subtle wit, and more. Brad Pitt must be the first name mentioned. He's just f***ing hilarious, there's no point in saying it any other way. Simply brilliant work, every second of it. After Brad comes the script itself, with perfectly chosen moments of comic relief to counter the intensity, of which there is plenty. But the last special mention goes to Christoph Waltz, who frankly owns the entire movie. The phrase "steals the show" was coined for exactly this sort of performance. You will love Christoph Waltz, even if you hate the rest of the movie, that I can guarantee.

I will make an minor note here. Q.T. has this sad little penchant for putting himself in his movies, and he usually likes to be the comic relief himself. He's not really a terrible actor; he can hold his own. But after a while it's just unnecessary. So I'd like to report with delight that he does not appear in I.B. Just so you know.

Chapter Five: The Talk
After Style, the thing you always have to give Q.T. credit for is his dialogue. Indeed, it's often the first thing critics will mention (again, me, I gotta go with the Style). But yes, Q.T. writes fantastic dialogue. It's undeniably what makes his characters so memorable, and what saves him from having a reputation of simply being about shock value. Pulp Fiction had some blood and guts, sure, but what everybody remembers is the Royale With Cheese and Walking The Earth. Long conversations, twenty minutes of two or three or eight people just sitting and talking. How many movies do you see with scenes that are twenty minutes long of just people talking? You wouldn't stand for it with anybody else, but when it's Q.T., we love it. We never want it to end, we could just listen to his wonderful characters talk forever.

Inglourious Basterds has the talk. Lots of great, vintage Tarantino dialogue. And yes, as I've already mentioned, it has the blood and guts too. There are visuals here you can do without, I promise you. But it's all part and parcel with Quentin. You can't separate out just the stuff you want, because it wouldn't be what you want. It has to be the full package, all five chapters, all of the Inglourious mess. You don't tell the master chef which ingredients he could leave out and still have the dish come out tasting just as good. You just grab a fork and dig in.

2009-08-22T20:30:00.002-07:00

The good news is I've been too busy to blog. The bad news is that I've also not really wanted to be honest about how hard it is to be here sometimes. I'm not sure where to go from there.

The newest news of the day is that I am now a very unproud owner of a Mazda MPV. That's a minivan. And in Canada, the first 'a' in Mazda sounds like the 'a' in 'apple'. But that's not really the problem I have with this minivan. I've just never wanted such a large vehicle. Our Toyota Echo is the car-love of my life. Lately, I'm particularly poor at embracing things that I'm not in favor of. We decided to buy one because I have the privilege of caring for my baby niece this school year. Then there might just be friends to bring home from school (both kindergarten and preschool will require driving). So. There's a minivan on the street and it's ours.

It's possible that we've found a church too; but again, I feel reluctant to dive into things. First, let's recount a few characteristics of the two churches of our marriage. #1. Very progressive. Trying to find new ways to do everything. Only original music is played. Highly transitive population. Very cool, brand-name-coffee-drinking people. #2. Mega church. 600 kids per weekend. Polished, podcasted sermons. Professional quality music, complete with former Christian rock star worship leader. Both church #1 & 2 are open to both liberals and conservatives. Possible church #3? 30 adults representing a range in ages. Very friendly, genuine people who bring their Bibles. Awful music; pitch and tempo are open to the fastest bidder. But those 30 people are really singing! Northwestern-College-style prayer requests are taken and prayed for popcorn-style during the service. Last week's sermon was a Bible study of Psalm 1 led by a missionary home from a country famous for its large black cube. We huddled into groups to answer the questions. There will be prayer meetings the next 3 Sunday evenings. Oddly enough, both Josh and I are similarly in favor of joining this church. We haven't even asked any theological questions. Somehow we don't care.

In other news, I have made a few friends. I don't know what else to say about that. I haven't found many friends the right ages and sexes for Toby and Alicia yet, but in two weeks that should be taken care of. Schools will start and our new life will begin in earnest. (And in Ernest's house, no less.)

Blogger's Block

2009-08-16T06:26:00.008-07:00

This is getting ridiculous.

Three weeks between posts? Here we are, forging new lives in the Great White North, hanging out with the exciting and glamorous Fuller family on a regular basis, as our dearly missed Minnesotan friends wait patiently for updates on how we're doing, and nothing for three weeks? The shame.

It is true that, what with work during the week, giving Michelle a break from the kids when I get home, and running new-life-forging-related errands on the weekends, it's harder to find time to write lately. But in all honesty I must admit, too, that when there is time, I seem to be having difficulty even coming up with anything to say. Perhaps my creative juices are a little drained from the effort of adjusting to so much newness. Perhaps I don't want to take the energy to examine and chronicle things right now, because life already takes more energy when it is new and less routine than after it becomes mundane. Perhaps I'd rather just watch movies.

Interesting note: I've only watched 11 movies so far this year. I started keeping track of my movie watching in 2007 (when I watched 67). The first half of this year was busy with preparing for the move, and the second half will be busy with life being new and different, but I will probably catch up a little bit as the year progresses. I almost saw District 9 this weekend, but it sold out just as we got to the theatre and Steve and I ended up just drinking good beer to bad music in a bar and laughing a lot. Good times.

Instead, I'm reading more books these days, because I'm taking the bus to work rather than driving. I just finished reading a book by Vancouver author Douglas Coupland, whom I tell people is sort of the Canadian Chuck Palahniuk, so they can ask me who Chuck Palahniuk is. The American Douglas Coupland, I suppose. This book was about computer programmers who work for Microsoft, and it was written fifteen years ago so it was quite a blast from the past. I've only been a programmer (we're called developers now) for seven years (off and on) now, so I wasn't quite around for these days, but I'm old enough to recognize and remember and laugh at the details of this very funny and poignant book. All of Douglas Coupland's (and Chuck Palahniuk's) writings are very funny and poignant. And other things (caustic, offensive, insightful, piercing, etc.). Now that I'm in Vancouver again, I will definitely have to catch up on all the more recent stuff Coupland has been writing while I've been away.

What else? Books and movies...these things are not our new life in Vancouver, but I think we're kind of ready to move past that. When Alicia was born, for a while this blog was only about Alicia. Has it been only about moving for this whole year? Maybe almost, but maybe I don't want to write about that so much.

It is hard, I will say that. I wrote a while ago about it being harder for Michelle and the kids than for me. Michelle is overstressed and I keep falling short of giving her the support she needs because I forget and expect her to be the same person she was in Minnesota, confident and in control of everything. She probably expects to be that person too, and it is very frustrating and stressful not to be able to be. Like John Travolta said of Europe in Pulp Fiction, it's the little differences, and in Canada they're even less expected. They sneak up on a new American and assault them like a mugger jumping out from behind your own car in your own driveway. You thought you knew how things worked, because honestly, how different can car insurance or banking be? Canada and the States are so alike in some ways that the ways they're different become rather difficult to deal with.

But Canada is a socialized country; it's true. Things like car insurance and banking are more regulated, and thus more expensive, sometimes in terms of money and sometimes in terms of the amount of time it takes to complete the transaction. Michelle has already mentioned that you pay one fourth the price of your car to insure it for one year, and that's with the safe driver discount. I pointed out that insurance and tabs are one thing here and two different things in the States (your car insurance and your plate registration are lumped into one transaction here), but it's still more expensive by a long shot. Banks charge all kinds of crazy fees. Fees for writing a cheque, fees for ATM withdrawals, fees for being charged fees. So yesterday we spent a part of our precious Saturday opening a new account at a credit union that charges fewer fees than the national banks. We were happy about that. This bank feels like it will be more what we're used to. (How about you get to have all our money, and that's a pretty good deal for you even without charging us anything?)

The fact that Canada is more socialized seems to be a hot topic right now, with Obama trying to help Americans understand the concept as it relates to health care. It's astonishing to me how many Americans act as though they're proud of the fact that millions of people can't afford to see a doctor in the States. Only in the very poorest countries in the world, or the richest one of them all. I've heard it pointed out that one and only one aspect of American health care is completely socialized: care for the military. Every single member of the Army, Navy, Special Forces and all other branches receives completely socialized care. So much for being against socialized health care but still supporting the troops?

But if you still really believe that the U.S. should shun socialization, here's something I didn't write (I wish I know who did, but I don't). It's just a fun little rant, reposted here for your edification. Enjoy.

This morning I awoke to the sound of my alarm clock powered by electricity generated by the Public Power Monopoly regulated by the US department of energy. I then took a shower in the clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the TV to one of the FCC regulated channels to see what the Weather Service of the National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration determined the weather would be like today using satellites designed, built and launched by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration. I did this while eating my breakfast of US Department of Agriculture inspected food and taking drugs determined safe by the Federal Drug Administration.

At a time that has been kept accurate by the National Institute of Standards and Technology and the US Naval Observatory, I got into my National Highway Traffic Safety Administration approved automobile and set out to work on roads built and maintained by local, state and federal departments of transportation. I checked my mail delivered by the US Postal Service and dropped the kids of at public school, then stopped for fuel of a quality regulated by the Environmental Protection Agency.

After work I drove my NHTSA car on DOT roads back home, which has not burned down because of state and local building codes and a fire marshal’s inspection. My house has not been plundered in my absence because of the local police department.

I then log onto the internet which was developed by the Defense Advanced Research Projects Administration and post in discussion forums about how socialized health care is bad because the government can’t do anything right.

New Old Friends

2009-07-25T08:58:00.006-07:00

Toby and Alicia had lots of fun last Saturday, celebrating Dada's birthday with their cousins and uncles and one aunt (miss you Auntie Brianna!).

Yesterday they took a walk with their other aunt.

And after so much action, it's always nice to get comfy on Papa Ernie's big comfy couch.

Reading Part 2

2009-07-14T20:26:00.002-07:00

For some reason I haven't had time to write more about how to teach reading, but I meant to. Here's a wee bit more.

Teaching reading really doesn't need to be a planned thing. You don't need special books. Your child doesn't need to suddenly be able to read a whole book. Lately, Toby and I have been doing lots of reading together where he might read part of a page, or just the easy words, or just not the hard words, or just the first few pages till he tires of it. It's a bummer that most of those "level 1" books are not level 1 at all, but really, you can use whatever you've got. The more familiar your child is with the book already, the better.

Tonight Alicia and I read one of her favorites, "The Runaway Pancake." After a couple pages I stopped,
M: Alicia, pancake starts with /p/(the sound). What letter is /p/?
A: I don't know. P.
M: Yeah. Do you see the 'p' on the page? (without really waiting, I point to the P because I want to go to bed). So what word is this?
A: Pancake.
M: Yeah.
I continued to read the story. I stopped every time I came to the word 'pancake'. It's a very predictable, repetitive story. As I read, I followed the words with my finger. At 'pancake', I'd wait for her to read the word. A couple times she said, 'rabbit' instead. I'd make the /p/ sound and she'd switch to pancake.

Fun stuff.

Now, what is Alicia actually doing when we do this? A couple things. She might be connecting that the letter P and the sound /p/ are connected to each other and connected to the word 'pancake'. Since she corrects to 'pancake' after the prompt of /p/, it's possible that she's making that connection. She is definitely following the story and making good predictions about what could go in that place in each sentence. I know that because 'rabbit' is also a character in the story. If she was giving me wrong answers that weren't characters, the syntax would be off. I would know that she wasn't keeping the meaning and pattern of the story together with any reading attempts. And that says a lot. If you've got a kid (or an adult for that matter) who's giving you nonsensical answers, then there isn't enough connection to meaning, not enough thought coming from the reader's head.

So, the two critical things to happen during reading are using the letters on the page and using all the other knowledge in the reader's head about the story and the language.

Really, I didn't do much with Alicia tonight, but this kind of thing keeps the letters and the meaning matched. It's fine if all or most of the time Alicia was just using her memory of the story to give me the right answers. I would rather that reading activities err (in instructive quality) on the side of exclusively using the reader's knowledge than get too focused on phonics exclusively.

Goodness. I know most of my readers would really benefit most from a list of activities to do. Can you tell I miss writing papers?

Home

2009-07-13T20:33:00.002-07:00

Michelle has done a great job keeping this blog up to date on the transition to living in White Rock, but I haven't done my part in offering my own perspective on our new situation. For Michelle and the kids, this has been a really mixed and sometimes quite difficult change, obviously. They have the excitement of living in a new place, seeing familiar and loved relatives more often, but also a lot of unfamiliarity, stress, and at the same time some boredom as Dad leaves them to go to work each day.

For Dad, the excitement is probably even greater, coming back to live near my own family and old buddies from my college/pizza delivery days. On top of that, I don't have the difficulty of figuring out things like kilometers and Celsius...well, not much. They come back pretty quickly. I do admit to not knowing where things like the library or the grocery store are, but I do know the area a little better than a total newcomer, and it doesn't really bother me. Perhaps I got used to not knowing where to find things in Minnesota.

At any rate, I'm not experiencing the stress that Michelle is, and while I miss my Minnesotan friends a great deal, I have the reunion with old friends to balance it with; the rest of my family doesn't. I am acutely aware right now that they have given up more than I have. I remind myself that I made this change to be with Michelle nine years ago, but nine years ago isn't right now.

It's also comforting that they didn't do this for me. Moving to Canada wasn't my decision; Michelle wanted to do it just as much. The kids were on board, as much as they could be according to their ability to understand. We knew it would be tough, and my family has willingly come along. They will get through this part.

And it's certainly not all bad. All three of them have really enjoyed themselves here in various ways so far. Being out of your comfort zone is not a bad thing. It's been a change for me too, of course. But it hasn't taken long for this to feel like Home.

Is it my home? I was asked the other day, after recapping the timeline of my life. The first four years in Saskatchewan, three in Haiti as a Missionary Kid, then back to Saskatchewan for ten more years. Move to British Columbia for one year, Calgary for eight months, then four more years in BC. Follow that with nine years in Minnesota. When you total it all up, I have lived longer both in Saskatchewan and in Minnesota than I have here. So why is this home? The other two really aren't in the way this is. My family is here, sure. But, without getting into depth, I never missed Saskatchewan for a single minute after we left. I was never in contact with any of those friends again. I wasn't all that attached to anything or anyone there. We came here and I loved it. I made great friends that remained friends throughout the nine years I was in the US.

Minnesota was definitely a home. I have great friends there as well and they will continue to be great friends. For the most part, I didn't feel like an outsider or unwelcomed in any way. But Canada was always my country. I learned Fahrenheit, I became a citizen and voted, but I was still Canadian.

So I guess all this rambling is just to say, if you're wondering, I'm home now and my wife and kids are not. It's kind of a strange thing. But we are still the same family, in this together and holding on tight as we discover our new Home.

The Road to a New Car

2009-07-10T15:28:00.003-07:00

Last Saturday
* Josh writes Ernie a check in USD
* Ernie writes Josh a check in CD

Monday
* Go to RBC. Learn that cash won't be available for 5 days unless certified.
* Go to CIBC to certify check. The bank is closed.

Tuesday
* Go to CIBC. Certify check.
* Go to RBC. Make deposit.
* Josh and Caleb go find a car. Guy wants a draft (cashier's check).

Wednesday
* 9:30am go to RBC. Can't get a draft because I don't have the guy's name with me.
* 4:07pm go to RBC. It's closed.

Thursday
* Go to RBC. Get draft.

Friday
* 9am Pick up Opa Don (Josh's step-dad), drive to buy car. I can't buy the car because I forgot my license.
* Opa Don drives the dealer's car home so that he can go to work.
* I drive our borrowed car home to get my license.
* 11am Drive to Opa Don's and trade cars.
* Drive back to the dealer. BC car insurance comes to insure the car. As an adult basic education teacher, I'm comfortable saying that the guy's level of literacy is a bit below what the job requires. One year of insurance costs 1/2 the price of the car. Once we provide our driving record, it will be a mere 1/4 the price of the car.
* 1pm Done, I drive home.
* McDonald's. The children were wonderful the whole time. They earned some salt, grease, and sugar.

Yes, so we now own a Toyota Echo. I love the car. As long as there's nothing wrong with it, we got a good deal. For the next car (which I am so not in a hurry to buy) I think we'll want one that can fit 3 car seats in the back. We'd also like to get good gas mileage, hence no minivan. Any recommendations for wide cars?

2009-07-08T11:27:00.002-07:00

At the grocery store today the clerk asked me if I wanted any cash. What's the answer? It's my fourth time there. They haven't asked me this before. Is it a rewards program? Have I earned cash with my points somehow? Because you earn points at grocery stores around here.

At the bank this morning there was a sign. 'GIC 1% Special offer. Ask for details.' Should I ask?

A Map

2009-07-03T19:20:00.001-07:00

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This Canadian Life

2009-07-02T21:27:00.004-07:00

Signs that I'm doing well in Vancouver. . .

Just finished a single batch of strawberry jam.

I listened to Matt Good and a techno remix of The Watchmen on the radio today.

I've got a $15/month club membership now. Been twice.

Have Toby registered for two different summer camps (half-day, week long) and Alicia registered for gymnastics with mom (4 sessions only). They start next week. Yes!

I say 'Ant Stacy' about 50% of the time.

I've figured out that the even numbered streets go through and the odd numbered ones might not. Genius. And if the streets have names, you're in White Rock. If the streets have only numbers, you're in Surrey (where the streets have no name...).

So far I've always been pleasant with my dear husband when he gets home from work 11-12 hours after he left the house in the morning (all three times he's gone to work so far).

Signs that I've got a ways to go . . .

The kids somewhat expect me to get lost on the way to parks.

I keep forgetting to bring a quarter when I go grocery shopping (for the grocery cart).

We don't have drivers' licenses yet (need driving records from MN by snail).

I have no clue what the speed limits are. I just drive what everyone else is driving.

I say 'Ahnt Stacy' about 50% of the time.

I keep forgetting that people to call long distance are now two hours ahead instead of two hours behind.

I find it odd that there are no screens on the windows. People even leave doors open. No bugs. The few flies that do fly in, fly out again. But what about the children who fly out?

The point in every day when I just completely lose it.

I hate grocery shopping. I have to decide what I'll buy organic and what not, what I might find and what I won't be able to find. Which yogurts my kids will eat and which not. There are no processed organic or natural meats to be found, it seems, even if I did want to pay for them. Bread is another thing that drives me nuts. I want my Great Harvest Bread! I have found one natural baker, but their bread is like rocks. What's to boast about in not using any yeast?

The kids . . . well, they have good signs and bad signs too. They really really miss their Granny. I'm not sure if it helps when we chat with her or makes it worse. They miss her. I'll say to Alicia, "Don't suck your lips, Licia. That's why they hurt." She'll come back with, "I don't suck my lips at Granny's." Right.

They do really love their Fuller family. They know full well how much attention they can get and they milk every bit of it. At the moment, Uncle Derek lives downstairs. As soon as he gets home from work, there they go. Love it. Tuesday, Licia didn't want to eat her dinner. She asked me, "Does Uncle Derek have dinner?" not too subtly suggesting that she wanted to eat downstairs with him.

The kids are the perfect ages for the move too. At 3 and 5, they are old enough to be decent playmates for each other and young enough to miss their friends somewhat minimally. Though today there was much lamenting over the loss of Zeke and Keara. And Gabe's toys. But today Toby said to Licia, "All of the sisters that I don't like are the same kind as you." I think that went over her head. I worry about Toby's social skills, but at the park today he seemed to be doing okay. It was Papa Bob style, just talking to everyone.

I've been trying a little Papa Bob style too. We'll see who finds a friend first. Me or Toby.

Where We Live

2009-06-27T07:54:00.007-07:00

Just so you have an idea of where we live now, when we wake up in the morning and look out the window, we see this.

In the afternoon, Michelle and Toby can go out to the back yard and pick some raspberries...

...then after dinner we can all drive down to the beach and walk along the ocean.

I'm in.

2009-06-24T19:13:00.002-07:00

Crossed the border. Legally. I have a one year visitor's visa while we wait for my permanent residence application to go through. I can't work. I can't go to school. I can't have free health care. But I can live with my family. That's good enough. That is what we expected, after all.

It feels good. It's been a long time coming. Josh has been working on this immigration as a part time job for a good 10 months now. Sell a house, move, submit applications, apply for jobs, interview, move again, drive. We're finally here. It feels good.

Oh, at the border Toby slunk below the counter and said quietly, "He doesn't allow five-year-olds." The man had stated casually that I couldn't have a visitor's visa for five years. I don't think Toby was really worried.

Alicia is amazingly glad to be back with her dad, but beyond that it's hard to know what she thinks. Over the past few days, Toby gave every indication of understanding the process we were in the midst of and seemed to be fine with it. Alicia sort of knew but mostly just couldn't grasp it. Yesterday (in MN) in the car she said, "Which house are we going to now? Why?" And playing with dolls, 'Dada, I love you.' to which the dada responded, 'I don't want to be with you.' Upon arriving at the Minneapolis airport, Alicia asked, "Where's Dada?" multiple times. She knew Dada was going to be at the airport, but forgot about having to do the flying part first.

So yeah, we're very happy to be together again. I'm sure I'm going to be the last one of us for whom this feels normal.

What the dashboard of a U-Haul starts to look like after three days of driving...

2009-06-24T09:19:00.002-07:00

Live From Liberty Lake

2009-06-21T20:31:00.002-07:00

I'm in a hotel in Liberty Lake, WA, right across the Idaho border, and they have a courtesy computer. The last person who used it was previously in the swimming pool, so the seat of my pants is now quite wet.

For those who haven't been following closely, here's the latest. I have been driving for the last two days in a U-Haul full of all our worldly possessions, and I have one more day to go to get to my dad's place in White Rock, BC. Michelle and the kids are staying with her mom until Wednesay, when they will fly to Seattle and I will be there to pick them up. The happily reunited family will then drive back up to White Rock, where they will live in bliss forever, or until the next time we do something like this.

The drive has been both long and fun, both monotonous and interesting. And most importantly, uneventful in the good sense. Props to Montana for being much more spectacular than it really has to be, all things considered. It was gorgeous from start to finish. And the little strip of Idaho was quite exciting, with lots of ups and downs and twists and turns, and trees covering every square inch of the surrounding mountainsides. Seriously, sometimes I would be down in between two vast slopes and all I could see out my great big U-Haul windshield was trees, completing coating the mountains which stretched up to block out the sky completely. It was rather disconcerting, but on the bright side I found myself thinking, "We've been making such a big deal about recycling paper for the last 10 years now, and they still have all this?!?" I'm not turning Republican or anything, I'm just saying, we're not out of trees yet.

So tomorrow I'll see Washington State. On this trip I've been struck by the notion that I'm being given the chance to see this country one last time, for a while. Really see it. I did this drive nine years ago, coming the other way, but when you're 23, fully developed as you might think you are, you haven't quite evolved as full a capacity for appreciating such majesty as I now have. Now that I'm 32 (soon), and quite definitely as mature and thoughtful as I will ever be, I've enjoyed the trip so much more. These past two days, I have seen stunningly green, rolling hills dotted picturesquely with conifers; I have seen staggering, looming faces of layered rock; I have seen rushing rivers of the most amazing blue. I have seen bison.

Other things I have seen:
- A wrought iron sculpture of flying geese. Actually quite good.
- A sign that reads, "Jesus is Lord of this Valley"
- An billboard advertising the Clinton, Montana Rocky Mountain Testicle Festival
- A billboard with a picture of the filthiest bathroom stall imaginable, and the statement, "No one imagines they'll lose their virginity here. Meth will change that."
- A restaurant called "Durango's Restaurant," which served me the most fantastic chicken mushroom fettucine alfredo, complete with fresh grated parmesan and excellent garlic toast, and only charged me ten bucks.

Those are the highlights that I can think of right now. I'm off to bed. Stay tuned for the rest of the story...

French Immersion!!

2009-06-16T11:54:00.003-07:00

Trying to register Toby for French Immersion in Canada was a crazy process. I don't remember if we blogged about it before. In the States, you would just mail in your form, then hope that a lottery-style pulling of names was in your favor. For the Surrey school district, we had to call in, with our calling card, and hope we got a line. Then they call you back in a week and tell you if you got in or are on the waiting list. We were just amazed they let us get on the list at all since we don't live in the country yet. So, Toby was number 30. The school said that number 30 usually doesn't get in, but maybe next year. Perhaps this year a family of sextuplets decided to pull them, because Toby is in! This will mean that Toby will have a 15 minute drive to school instead of walking around the block. But he's a pretty good driver, so that shouldn't be a problem. Oh, what fun! Just to brag, Google maps recommends a route to school that takes us along the ocean. I had been bragging that the class Toby was enrolled in had only 13 kids. This immersion classroom will have 22. Still, that sure beats the 30 kindergartners per class in this MN school district!

So. Fun times.

For the Bible tells me so?

2009-06-13T14:50:00.002-07:00

I remember pulling into the garage one night after work in September. Josh had called me that night at work to tell me that we had an offer on the house. We had put our house on the market the preceding week. As in, 7 days previously. One couple had come twice to see it. I asked God, "Do you really love me this much? Is this really you showing me how much you love me? God, how much do you love me?" Apparently death by cross isn't enough for me. Equally apparent, God does love us. Quite a bit. Our house sold. I was wracked with anxiety the whole time because it just didn't look like it was going to go through. We'd already paid two months on the house we were going to rent. We were packed. And I still didn't quite believe that God loved me, I guess.

I'm modern. The term refers to a system of thought that we use as the operating system of our developed world. Scientific, if-then thinking. It's good in that it helps us understand that the flu is not caused by demons or spirits, but germs, and that if we wash our hands, we're more likely to stay healthy. Clearly good. It also wraps us in logic that is not terrifically helpful in understanding God. If my house sells fast, God must love me. So, if your house takes eons to sell, God doesn't love you. You must have some unconfessed sin or something. It just doesn't follow. Yet it does follow that when I remember that God loves me, my anxiety melts.

A couple weeks ago, I talked to a man who lives in our former townhomes. He told me about a unit that was on the market for six months for $14,000 less than we had listed ours, and it had not sold. They must have listed it just after we moved. If they had been on the market at the same time as us . . ? And just before we listed ours, one sold for about $25,000 less than ours. As it was, we had to show up with cash for the sale to go through. We didn't even ask for the amount we still owed. But we sold the house. And we're moving to Canada.

Some would say that God wants us to go. I don't know. It's been the desire of our hearts to be there. It could just be that God loves us.

Two Weeks

2009-06-06T05:39:00.002-07:00

It's coming at us fast now. Our big moving-out day is two weeks from today. Two weeks to get everything in boxes, get rid of the stuff we aren't bringing with us, and handle all the other little details that need to be arranged. We're still in good shape, overall. Big things like cars, flights, drop-offs, pick-ups, leases, help loading, help unloading, are mostly figured out already. I won't go into it all now.

One of the things that happens as it gets closer, much like when a family approaches the arrival of a new baby, is that no one can talk to you about anything else. Every day at work I get asked when my last day at work is (June 18). Every friend who calls or stops by asks how the packing is going (we've got a decent start on it). What are you doing with your cars? Where are you going to live? I forget, did Josh get a job yet?

So forgive me for not going into it all again...it's become a daily exercise for us. It's coming fast, but being the proactive and organized family that we are, we feel like we're staying on top of it, if barely. The next major chore that I'm about to get to (maybe today) is compiling the actual list of (approximately) everything that will be in the truck and the (approximate) value in Canadian dollars of each item, which will be asked for at the border. That should be fun.

Dear readers, you may not see another update to this blog, or certainly not very many, for the next month or so. Thank you for your understanding, and be assured that we shall return eventually, with many exciting stories of our new homeland and how we got there. Stay tuned!

Legoland

2009-05-27T17:58:00.004-07:00

We made use of the Memorial Day long weekend to drive all the way down to Chicago to check out the Legoland Discovery Center there. Although it wasn't quite large enough to occupy us for a full day, it was still worth the trip.

Alicia was pretty worn out by dinner time.

Reading

2009-05-15T14:57:00.002-07:00

I've been saying for a long time that I would blog about how to teach your children to read. And now, I'm going to begin. This could take quite some time.

Josh could read before he was three.
I think I taught Toby to decode just before turning three. I can't remember. It was some time around there.
I taught myself how to read when I was 4 1/2. I'm a late bloomer around these parts.
Alicia isn't ready to read yet.

Thus begins one of the biggest questions: How do you know your child is ready to start reading? The answer: Oh there are so many things. I could also say, Well, what do you mean by reading?

A child doesn't need to know all the names of the letters of the alphabet in order to start reading. For some children, the names get in the way of reading, because the names are not the same as the sounds. Some children have trouble with the fact that the letters can have both a name and a sound. So don't get hung up on knowing all the names. They DO, however, need to be able to differentiate most of the letters from each other. Trouble with d/b is common, but for the most part, children need to spend time with the letters on the fridge, in a puzzle, or jello, or something just so they all look familiar.

Children need a vocabulary of at least 3,000 words before they start to read. I'll need to say lots about decoding at some point, but even after sounding out a word, there is a significant jump that needs to be made in order to match those sounds to a word that is already known. Children also need to have a good sense of what would come next in a sentence. That way, they can make a good guess about what might come next. We do it.

There's the sit still factor. Young children should be running and moving and playing and imagining their own stories. They shouldn't be sitting at the table with their mother for 30 minutes every day learning how to read. I believe that. But I couldn't stop myself from teaching Toby to read. We worked at it for maybe 10 minutes at a time. Maybe once a week. Sometimes I'd wait a few months before getting back to it. And he'd tell you that he hated reading. He'd also laugh at the stories he was reading and look quite proud with himself for being able to read. I think he just didn't want to do something that took that much effort. Should I push? Should I wait? It's hard to know. I don't want him to hate reading, but it didn't ever seem like he really did hate it. And he could totally do it. I also didn't want my son to not do things just because they were hard. But he was young. Yeah, I don't know. Ask Toby when he's 18 if I chose the right time to teach him to read. For now, he's actually choosing to read a book to his dad at night. And he's starting to read random print that he sees here and there. You know your kid. You choose.

I'm not sure that there is conclusive research out there that links the amount of time parents spend reading to their children with children's ease of learning to read. There's some common sense that links those two things, but they don't match up directly. One thing to notice is that written English is quite different from spoken English. Different words will be used with different frequencies in print vs. speech. Much of that has to do with the way that you choose to read a book. How much do you link words or not? What is the melody and rhythm of your voice as you read? For children who haven't been read to, it could sound like a foreign language. But I doubt I have any readers here who don't read to their kids, so we'll move on.

I'm going to jump into decoding in order to explain some more things kids need to be able to do in order to read. When you model decoding for a child, be careful how you pronounce each letter. Try to say the word continuously, without separating the letters, in order to avoid saying something like "da-o-ga". What's a daoga? If you say the consonants by themselves, it's almost impossible to avoid adding an extra vowel. So, string the whole thing together, slowly. Some teachers call it stretching out the word.

Listening to a stretched out word and matching it to a normal word that you know is a skill. Toby's pretty good at it for words that are maybe four or five sounds long, but he still has trouble with longer words. Some kids can't really do just two or three sounds. So you can practice that. Stretch out words and have your child figure out what word it is. It can be an ongoing game. Excellent for the car and in stores. "Next we need to find some mmmeeeeeellllllllkkkkkk. Where would that be?" Okay, people might think you're nuts. But there it is. Your kid is looking around for milk instead of pulling things off the shelves. Toby separates words all the time just for fun. He'll talk like that. If your kid is doing that, make him read.

Another problem with sounding words out is that even if you become an expert at not adding extra vowels, loads of phonetic words still don't sound quite the same when you sound them out as when we actually say them. Music. We add an invisible /y/ between the m and u. Then the s is really a /z/. Actually, s's and ed's can be quite a problem. If they follow a voiced consonant they are voiced /z/ and /d/. If they follow an unvoiced consonant they are unvoiced /s/ and /t/. If they follow certain sounds, they become /ez/ and /ed/. Your child can do this in speech, but the process of decoding and then matching that decoding to a normal sounding word is tough.

I've wound my way out of 'when is your child ready to read' and onto general reading philosophy now.
Phonics or Whole Language? Honestly, I've never understood the philosophy of whole language and how it is supposed to teach reading. I think there are a lot of things going into this. First, I think it's easy to agree that there are real problems with decoding. Still it really is necessary in order to read new words. If a child simply learns that a word that looks like this general shape (tree) means that brown and green thing in front of my house, the child will get stuck at the third grade reading level. The brain can only learn a certain number of shapes and then it maxes out at about third grade reading level. What about those Chinese? Even Chinese characters are combinations. We have to be able to sound out words, there isn't a way around that.

My dearest daughter doesn't yet know all the letters of the alphabet. What intrigues me is that I have been trying to teach her the remaining letters and they just aren't sticking with her. One of those letters is C.
M "What is this?"
A "I don't know."
M "It's the letter for cookie."
A "Oh! That's C!"
I think that whole language advocates would like my daughter and I think my daughter would like them. There does have to be meaning involved. My daughter seems to need a different level of meaning than Toby does or did. I'm thinking that my son might be detail oriented and my daughter might be more global. We'll see if I'm right. When I've tried to begin teaching Alicia to decode, she can't do it at all (yes, I do know that she's 3). I think I might try letting her memorize a simple book, and then go backwards. "You know that this word is 'Maisy.' What letter comes first? Yeah, M. And what's the first sound in Maisy?" First I'll teach her the words and sentences, then the sound-letter correspondence. We'll see what happens.

The bummer for teachers is that they have both types of kids in the same classroom. Know your kid and let their teachers know what you think about how your kid processes things. But elementary teachers have very strong opinions about how to teach reading and might not care what you think. That's when you read this post again and do your own thing at home that suits your child.

Another of my major thoughts about reading that is probably coming through already is that what goes on in the reader's head is extremely important. It's important for decoding and comprehension. So don't do anything to diminish your child's guessing and thinking while reading. When there are mistakes, just remind your child to check the word to see if she is right. When she guesses right, you really won't know whether she read the word or guessed it.

Toby's reading at this point involves an awful lot of looking at the pictures and using his knowledge of English patterns and even story patterns to guess while he's reading. And he should be. And that shouldn't stop as he becomes more proficient. Some of us can get really hung up on kids learning to decode and so we play games in which kids have to read with no context. Grrr, is what I think of those games. Avoid them. Reading should always have context. Words should be in sentences. The sentences should make sense. They should sound like normal written English. Why? Because readers should and need to be able to make guesses about what the words are that they are reading. When we give kids single words to read or books with odd, poorly constructed sentences, we don't respect their ability to make good use of the language they already possess. Now, do we make words out of alphabet cookies at our house? Oh yes. On the fridge, sure. But it's occasional. I wouldn't focus on it. I certainly wouldn't push it or depend on it for instruction.

I've been teaching my adult students different strategies for reading comprehension this year and had a lot of success. Most of my students had some education in their first language as children, but few finished school. Most of them are poor readers in any language. I think that one of the traits common to poor readers is that they don't trust what's in their heads. Here's an example. I wrote out a story for my students that was basically:

Alicia was sick. I took her to the doctor. The doctor wrote a prescription. We went to Walgreens. I asked for flavoring in the medicine because the doctor said that the medicine would taste bad. I gave Alicia the medicine.

I asked my students, when did the doctor tell me that the medicine would taste bad? They answered, At the pharmacy. I asked my students (all perfectly intelligent adults), Did the doctor come with me to the pharmacy? No, they answered without trouble. And then I gave them a lecture about trusting themselves. I think poor readers put too much trust in the print and not enough trust in themselves (my students trusted the order of the story more than they trusted their own common sense). Good reading calls on the reader to make the correct decision about what the word is, but it also calls on the reader to make value judgments, to put things in the right order, and so much more. This is all to say, it's a good thing when your child looks at the picture and makes a guess about the word. It's a good thing when you child reads a sentence and fills in a word that makes sense even if it's wrong. They do also need to learn to check their guesses with the print. I'm afraid that learning to read by predominantly spending time manipulating letters on a table may teach a child to decode, but not to read.

So, that's a start. I still haven't touched what to actually do. I'll get to that.

A New Friend

2009-05-05T19:16:00.005-07:00

Toby has a new friend. He's eight and a half, lives right down the street from us, and is named Zack.

Zack gets along great with Toby and Alicia, and has taken to just riding his bike over to our house in the evenings and asking if Toby can play. Toby seems to really enjoy him most of the time. I think Michelle has written here before about how Toby's vocabulary and imagination can sometimes be over the heads of kids his own age, so playing with an eight-year-old is probably an okay change of pace for him.

Zack is already in the know about our plans to move, and is really bummed that he only gets to be friends with Toby for 45 more days. He even pleaded with me to stay longer, so I had to explain to him about jobs and leases and plane tickets and how we can't really change it now.

It's been interesting to me how Michelle and I are reacting differently to Zack's arrival in Toby's life. For me, this is a significant milestone. Having a friend who just rides his bike down the street, shows up and plays with Toby seems like a huge step. For Toby socially, but also just in terms of the rhythm of life and parenting. I love it. There's no planning and arranging to be done, no driving, dropping off or picking up, it's just an instant friend all of a sudden. And just like that, Toby has very little need for my attention or interest in what I'm doing. He's off in his room or in the back yard with his buddy, leaving me to do dishes, play with Alicia, or whatever I'd like to do (as long as I keep them in earshot, of course). I love spending time with my son, but any parent knows that it certainly doesn't have to be all the time.

Michelle is taking it very differently. Zack is older, of course, and from a different family. A fairly unknown family, as far as we're concerned...we know there are something like six kids in the house, and I've had a five minute conversation with Zack's mom (while she was outside for a smoke), but other than that it's anyone's guess. So it's a little hard for her to welcome the idea of Toby spending so much time with Zack, particularly if it's not completely supervised. But it's probably not just suspicion or distrust on her part. There's just the simple truth that we as his parents, up to this point, have had near total control of everything in his life. His friends have been the children of our friends; his activities have been what we steer him towards; his toys, hobbies and interests have all been under our watchful and encouraging gaze. It's just a hard thing to watch the outside world begin to creep into that sphere of control, no matter from whence. So I can totally understand how Michelle feels.

I still think it's pretty great, though.

In the bag

2009-05-03T16:25:00.005-07:00

What? It's only May 3rd. I just finished my final exam and final project for my second-to-last course today. Now I have to write my research report, and I'm done. Till when? Oh that is the question.

I've been planning on taking a class this summer. It's only offered in the summer. I'd like to be finished by this time next year. If I . . . Okay, so my husband said, "I won't let you take that class this summer." I turned slowly. I smiled. I looked at him for a while. I waited for more. Perhaps a fakish manly gesture or grunt of some sort. An attempt at a demeaning, I'm-your-God-appointed-head sort of stance. But he merely continued watching his game. In his very Josh, passive, I'm not quite as addicted to basketball as everyone might think, posture. I had to go next. Why? is what I offered for my turn. I think his answer was, because you won't be able to work on it for three weeks. (If you are unacquainted with online learning, mine is of the type where you don't just go at your own pace. You have things to do every week together with other people.)

So. If I'm not teaching this summer and I'm not taking any classes, on what can I base my worth?

I think I'll take my time on the research writing. I might feel better with it hanging over my head for a while longer. I'll miss it when it's done.

For the bored and over-literate. . . this was actually on my exam (that's handed in already). Come up with pairs of phrases can that pose segmentation issues for learners. Examples:
a tax on city buses; attacks on city buses
Paula praised; Paul appraised
nitrate; night rate
a tease; at ease
You get the point. I had to come up with two more.
Pete's a man; Pizza man
loser; lose her
What can you add?

Time

2009-04-27T07:55:00.003-07:00

My children are playing together nicely without me. Whatever can I do?

I get to give a presentation for a staff development meeting at work tonight. I'm definitely nervous. I expect a tough crowd. Perhaps I'll be pleasantly surprised. But these are teachers who have to be at this meeting, they didn't choose to go, like the last time I presented. And these teachers think that I don't know anything. On the contrary, very few of them have any ELL training at all. I nearly have two degrees on the subject. Grr. But I'm still afraid of them. I'm presenting on the order of morpheme acquisition. I made a lovely PowerPoint and everything. We'll see. Oh, I'm nervous just typing about it.

In other news . . .
Alicia was trying on my bra the other day. She asked questions about why she didn't have one. Her argument included: But all my friends have one.

Here's a book that everyone should read:
Frederick Buechner, The Son of Laughter
Laughter is Isaac. His son is Jacob. Frederick Buechner is brilliant. Mr. Buechner is a minister and an author. A highly capable one. And for a Christian, he's quite gutsy. Buechner's not afraid to probe the sacred and ask the questions that we really need and don't find answers to. He's not so shallow as to offer answers. He's intelligent and skilled enough to peel back the scabs of pat Christianity to bleed the questions. What effect did the attempted sacrifice have on Isaac? How crazy were these people to believe in a God that they couldn't see? How in the world could these people believe that they were God's gift to the world when they sure look far more sinful than anyone else we know? It's good stuff.

And now Alicia's yelling. Time's up.

The Internet Just Keeps Getting Better

2009-04-25T08:50:00.002-07:00

Mankind has taken another giant leap forward. You may now make fake-looking, fake-sounding people do and say whatever you want, easily and for free, at xtranormal.com. Two minutes seems to be the limit, though. So without further ado, A Fuller Understanding is proud to present, the first two minutes of Waiting For Godot.

The Official Announcement

2009-04-20T17:54:00.003-07:00

All is now settled. I have accepted a job with Kore Interactive, and will be starting there on June 29th. This means, among other things, that my last day of work here will be June 19th, and our big moving day, upon which all friends, well-wishers, and takers of all the free stuff that we will just be handing out will be invited for packing and pizza.

We're very excited, and we're about to become very busy for two months. Minnesotan friends, make sure we see you again before we leave!

The Quick Trip

2009-04-17T18:54:00.003-07:00

Yes, I am back from my whirlwind trip to Vancouver. The long and short of it is, I had a great interview with Kore Interactive and I am told they will be making me an official job offer on Monday. So of course further details will be posted here as soon as that happens. But for those wanting more info on the events of the last few days, perhaps this format would be most suitable:

Tuesday
4:30 AM - Wake up, get dressed, eat, drive to the airport.

7:00 AM - Take off for Seattle.

8:30 AM - Land in Seattle.

9:30 AM - Board the Quick Shuttle Bus for Vancouver

12:00 PM - Cross the border into Canada. No hassles.

12:30 PM - Hop off the shuttle, find Dad's car which he's not using while he's in London and which was left there for me by my brother who is probably at work by now. Drive to Mom's.

12:45 PM - Eat leftover Easter ham and potatoes out of Mom's fridge. Watch TV, shower, put on nicer clothes than I would ever actually wear to work for this company.

2:30 PM - Grab resume and reference letters and head out the door.

3:30 PM - Park at a meter and wander around looking for a store that will change a $20 so I can pay the meter. No one will. Walk out of the fourth store and almost bump into two cops. Explain to them that I am trying to break my twenty and pay the meter and could they please not give me a ticket. They look at me funny. I find a currency exchange, get some coins, come back to the car to find that the cops put a dollar in my meter for me. Yup, this is Canada.

4:00 PM - Interview with Kore Interactive. This would be a great place to work. Todd introduces himself and informs me that he is quite sick. We have a short, animated conversation in which I ask him as many questions as he asks me, I brag about the cool stuff I've done at the BCA back home in Minnesota, he alludes to the fact that most developers with my skills and qualifications can't actually hold an actual conversation with normal people and seems very pleased that I clearly can. He promises I will hear from them early next week, and doesn't shake my hand because, oh yeah, he's sick.

5:00 PM - Make it back to White Rock and tell everyone the good news. Great dinner with my brother Brad, my brother Derek and his girlfriend Angie, my sister Brianna and her husband Caleb, my mom and her husband Don. Catch up with everybody, eat a plethora of desserts and drink wine.

9:00 PM - Drive over to Derek's place for some serious Rock Band 2 action.

11:30 PM - Back to Mom's, fall into bed.

Wednesday
6:30 AM - Wake up, get dressed, eat.

7:30 AM - Pick up buddy Steve. Much jesting as we drive up into downtown Vancouver.

8:20 AM - Fantastic coffee. Yup, this is Vancouver.

8:30 AM - Interview with Steve's company. I'm clearly not quite what they need right now, but reasonably close, actually. Great conversation with the HR department and this seems like it would also be a great place to work. I seem to have impressed, and if nothing else I've made another contact, at a place where Steve can always put in a good word for me if I need it. Right now it's looking like Kore is going to be the place, but it was fun to be able to interview here too.

10:45 AM - Ironically, this time I got a ticket, because I was there longer than I thought I was going to be.

11:45 AM - Back at Mom's, everybody's at work. Eat more leftover ham, watch a movie, go online and pay the parking ticket.

3:30 PM - My cousin Travis shows up with his wife and 6-month-old daughter. Fun talk catching up. We decide to drive over and see my niece. Stacey is glad to see us, Abby is enthused to see Kacia, and Kacia is cautiously observant of Abby. My niece Kacia is amazingly beautiful, adorable and definitely reminds me of her dad Brad, though I can't explain exactly how.

6:30 PM - The Vancouver Canucks play their first playoff game tonight. The gang (Derek, Angie, Brianna, Caleb, Steve, and a couple of Angie's friends) meets at Sawbuck's pub to watch the game and eat far too many chicken wings. I drink more beer than I usually do, but I still can't keep up with Steve. The Canucks win. Some guy gives me a Canucks hat, for free, and he gives my sister a T-shirt. Yup, this is Canada.

10:00 PM - Back to Derek's for even seriouser Rock Band 2 action. My voice has become hoarse from singing Disturbed, Metallica and System Of A Down songs. The drums kinda make your back sore too. If you've never done it...Rock Band is amazingly fun.

2:00 AM - Back to Mom's, fall into bed.

Thursday

6:00 AM - Wake up, get dressed, eat, drive to the airport.

9:00 AM - My mom and I are on a tiny plane from Vancouver to Seattle. There is no first class, no middle seats, and no coffee. So, my mom had already planned a trip to visit us in Minnesota before I lined up this interview, and it just happened that she was flying out on the same day that I had to be coming back home. So we got on the same planes.

10:00 AM - We land, wait two hours for the flight from Seattle to Minneapolis.

12:00 PM - Take off. Normal plane. I'm about half asleep for about half the flight.

5:30 PM - Land. Drive home.

6:30 PM - Mmmm...Michelle made pizza.

Friday
8:00 AM - Go to work.

3:00 PM - Email from the President of Kore: Hi Josh, your interview went great. I will be sending you an offer letter Monday afternoon.

Yes.

And yes, I am inviting your ridicule.

2009-04-09T11:42:00.003-07:00

By now I've heard this statement many times from many sources, but if you don't run in the sorts of circles where this is common knowledge, allow me to clue you in this simple, curious fact.

Jon Stewart is the most important journalist in the world.

The argument writes itself, of course. Of the people who get all their news from one place, more get it from him than any other one place. The Daily Show is insightful, up to the minute, concise, and frequently accurate. And most importantly, Jon Stewart will often deliver not merely the funniest take on current events, but the most intelligent, well-researched, even truthful explanation of what they ultimately mean to us as Americans. You don't even have to be a liberal to see this, though it sure as shit helps.

Am I guilty of overstatement? Well, yeah. But just watch for yourself.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

M - Th 11p / 10c

Baracknophobia - Obey

thedailyshow.com

Daily Show
Full Episodes

Economic Crisis

Political Humor

The Four Things We Worry About

2009-04-07T15:39:00.005-07:00

How else are you going to know what the recent developments in our busy and eventful household are if I never take the time to write about them? Well, by actually communicating with us by phone, email, Facebook, or even in person, I suppose. But today, all of that is unnecessary thanks to this. These are the top four sources of stress in our lives lately, and there is news about all of them.

4. Alicia's Ears
Well, her ears, her lungs, and her hemangiomas are the only things left about Alicia that we could possibly be concerned about, and there has been no reason whatsoever to worry about the last two lately. However, Alicia has had a couple of ear infections since her tubes fell out a couple months ago. The tubes falling out was normal and expected; the ear infections somewhat normal as well, but she has also been asking us to repeat things lately and we were getting concerned that her hearing might be affected again and the tubes would have to go back in.

But as it happened, today was her regular six month ear check. Her hearing test showed that she can hear wonderfully well, and her exam showed no fluid or infection in the ears. As of today, she is aurally healthy and shows no signs of requiring further attention in the future. Sigh of relief. I guess when she asks us to say something again, it just means we mumble too much.

3. Michelle's Visa
I haven't checked with Michelle on the ordering here, by the way. Her worriorities might be arranged entirely differently. Anyway, her application for permanent residency in Canada is still being processed. This week we received a letter from Canadian Immigration informing us that an interview will probably not be required in the process. They asked for a few additional documents though, which is apparently a normal step in the process. They need to see another background check on Michelle from the state of Minnesota (no problem), Toby and Alicia's birth certificates (okay, sure), and proof of Toby and Alicia's Canadian citizenship. That sounds simple enough, but what it actually means is their citizenship certificate cards which we applied for back in September. We haven't received them yet, and we were told the process could take 8 to 12 months. Strange that such a simple, relative formality takes longer than some much more complicated applications. So we will be letting them know that those are still in the works, and we'll see what happens.

2. Michelle's Degree
Michelle is still hard at work on her Master's in ESL Education. She continues to enjoy the classes and love what she's learning, but being so busy is additional stress on her. She has just finished the final project for one of the three classes she is currently taking. Next week that class will wrap up and she will only have two going for the rest of the term, so the load is lightening.

1. Josh's Job
Not my job in Minnesota, which rocks, but the process of finding a job in Vancouver to move to. I have refrained from posting minute by minute updates here, since it can be such a tedious process to actually find a new job, but there are some real developments to report. I will be flying to Vancouver one week from today, there to interview in person with a company with whom I have already had two interviews by phone. Not to jinx it, but they have indicated that they are pretty happy with me and I have every reason to hope that they will be offering me a position following this face to face meeting. If that turns out to be the case, and depending on how soon all the details are worked out, we could be officially moving before the end of June. Even if things don't go as smoothly, we will probably decide to go in July anyway. Things have reached the point where we are pretty much committed to the idea, and if the job is not there, we will just need to take the leap anyway and see where we land. But hopefully we will not find ourselves in that position, and the best news is that we might know as soon as in one week.

So what four things are you worrying about most?

2009-04-01T08:25:00.000-07:00

Alicia: Mom, I'm making maddy noises.

Theories

2009-03-30T17:40:00.003-07:00

The further back in the archives of this blog you go, the more likely you are to encounter a post in which I espouse some ridiculous theory that I've come up with. Rest assured that it is not because I no longer hold such theories that those posts are appearing less frequently nowadays. I am still occasionally accosted by odd notions that strike me as, if not entirely true, at least strangely compelling, like my theory that Keanu Reeves is the logical antithesis of Kevin Costner because he consistently gives bad performances in good movies (where as Costner consistently does the reverse). Or that Korn is the only band that consistently writes songs in which the bridge is the best part of the song, better than the chorus and verses.

The other night, I attended a concert with my wife at our church. I enjoyed the concert quite a bit, for although it was not quite my favorite style of music, the performers were all very talented and creative, and that carries a lot of weight with me. Also, the songs were all accompanied by images being shown on the two large screens in our church auditorium, after the fashion of all trendy and hip churches in our day and age. As is the norm, these images were mostly extreme-close-up photographs of things which no sane human being would take photographs of, like hand railings or guitar frets or water. One was of telephone wires, and as I stared absent-mindedly at the photograph while listening to the song, I had the idle thought that the photograph might be greatly improved if a pair of sneakers were hanging, tied together, from one of the telephone wires, and in the next second an entirely new theory popped, unbidden and fully formed, into my mind.

I hope the singer of that song wouldn't take offense at this, because I was enjoying the song. Sometimes I just can't stop my brain.

So I will share this theory with you. The theory is, quite simply, that there is a simple and logical explanation for the mysterious phenomenon of sneakers hanging from telephone wires. Even snopes offers no good explanation for it, but I do, here and now, in one word: photographers.

Photographers do not think correctly. They are able to see an object or landscape from all possible angles at once, and make snap judgments on which will render the subject most aesthetically appealing (or jarring, if you happen to be that sort of photographer). As I've said, they even do this for subjects that no one has any interest in looking at, no matter the angle therefrom. And I realized that photographers would naturally be having the same thought which I just had, that a shot of some telephone wires is much more interesting if there's a pair of shoes hanging from them. Not right in the center of the picture, of course, because nothing can ever be right in the center of a picture. That would be silly. But maybe over towards one side, or in a corner, a simple pair of old, worn shoes dangling, just to give the eye something interesting to do.

So before they snap their picture, they find a pair and toss them up there. And there they stay for future generations of photographers to be inspired by. Of course in these advance times, it's an unoriginal idea, but you have to admire the first photographer who ever thought of it, and snapped that first picture, which must have started a slow, gradual chain reaction, as one photographer at a time thought that they might improve or expand on his concept, until it snowballed into a global phenomenon which has expired many an urban legend much sillier than the hypothesis I have presented here.

And now I have inflicted another theory on you. No need to thank me.

2009-03-26T07:20:00.002-07:00

Toby: There is only one more Playmobil set that I need. As soon as I get it, I'll stop wanting it.

2009-03-25T13:55:00.001-07:00

Zeke: I'm blessed by learning self control.
Toby: What is self control?
Zeke: It's doing what you should do and not what you want to do.
Toby: I don't have that.

(Zeke is Toby's 4-year-old friend)

Centering

2009-03-16T17:42:00.002-07:00

I've written before about how I generally work in nooks and crannies of time. I have, I am happy to report, taken steps to dust off some time in the middle of the day by hiring a friend to watch my children. It's lovely, and I'm breathing better.

Last week time was ever-more scrunched. I had a retreat to go on for the weekend (read: a lack of study time) and Toby had an earache (read: someone needs to take Toby to the doctor). On top of that, we hadn't had any time together as a whole family for days. Something was going to have to give. The general solution was going to be that I'd have to study after the kids went to bed and I'd be up late. Boo-hoo, you all say. I know. I asked for it, right? What's with that mom doing a Master's anyway?

So Josh took two hours off of work. Now, Josh is hourly. He gets paid two hours less for this. Michelle getting her homework done suddenly has a monetary value attached to it, if you choose to think of it that way.

This was huge for me. Huge in terms of balancing the value of my work vs. Josh's. Huge. It's always me that's gotten squeezed before.

I read parts of a book last fall called The Bitch in the House. It's a series of essays about being a woman. One woman wrote about living with her boyfriend who didn't know how to do much around the house but was willing to learn. She pondered why she still ended up doing everything and didn't try harder to give him space to learn and have responsibility. She wondered if perhaps she had pride in being able to do so many things that he couldn't.

This struck me. I definitely have pride in all the domestic things I can do that Josh can't, but not so much as to stop me from moving over and letting Josh take more responsibility. And he does. I have the right husband for this. Letting Josh take the time off work to take Toby to the doctor so that I could study was huge. I dare say that I really am ready for Josh to stay home with the kids so that I can work full time for a while, if only that were an economic possibility (I make 10% of Josh's salary).

I also think about my kids. When I was 15, I was practicing baking cakes for my family. Josh was shooting baskets and reading. Now he's better at basketball and reading and I'm better at making cakes. Go figure. But Alicia loves to help me unload the dishwasher and wants to watch me cook. Toby just wants to play Legos. I just can't . . . .

Missing Mama

2009-03-14T18:08:00.004-07:00

Michelle is off having fun at our church's women's retreat this weekend, so it's just us three. So what goes on around the house when Mom isn't home?

Toby doesn't like to pose for pictures.

SFW

2009-03-06T06:59:00.002-08:00

Well, it appears this blog is no longer accessible from Google after Michelle's anatomy lesson yesterday. What do you have to say about that, adorable niece Kacia?

All in a day's work

2009-03-04T19:16:00.003-08:00

This post may not be appropriate for children.

I teach English to adults who don't speak very much English. In case you are somehow unaware of that. Today we were reviewing body parts. After covering ankle, knuckle, . . the whole bit, the students sat down and I said, I realize I haven't told you everything. A student said, Yeah, we realized that too. Should I? Do you want me to? I think I'm going to be red.

Come on. If Michelle Fuller isn't going to teach her students the fun words, who will? So I did. I wrote on the board, Woman and Man. Under them I wrote vagina, breasts, then penis, testacles. Then I looked up testacles in the dictionary and changed it to testicles. I just don't read and write about these things very often. Then I wrote down circumcision and condom. Students called out other words that they knew, checking to see if they were the same. Pussy. Dick. Titties. Boobies. It was good stuff. They weren't sure what testicles were right off, so students called out descriptions. One woman said, the two tomatoes. I'm glad I'm not married to her husband.

So I classified the other words for them; a prostitute maybe says pussy, but if you like the woman, you shouldn't say pussy. Dick, people actually say that one. Not doctors, but other people. My students have learned most of these words from their teenagers and have no reference for knowing which words are the right words and which aren't. It was fun. I didn't get into words for sex, but the person they are having sex with probably speaks their language.

Toby Hits the Half Decade

2009-03-02T19:03:00.008-08:00

Toby's party on Sunday was a huge success, with a good mix of old friends from church and new friends from preschool.

We experienced many of the joys of being a secret agent, Lego style. There were missions, an obstacle course, and a Lego Agent piñata made by Dad. Avon boxes are tough!

After he was totally demolished and the candy collected, it was time for birthday cupcakes!

And last but not least, presents! Lego sets were the big hit, of course, but a pair of light sabers was also popular...

Then and Now

2009-02-27T16:38:00.004-08:00

These days, I so seldom sit down to write a blog post that it makes no sense whatsoever to limit a post to one topic. Here are some noteworthy items:

We just had the Oscars, and if you've already forgotten I will not blame you. There was nothing of note other than the usual combination of nice-to-see-them-win awards and are-you-joking awards.

Nice To See:
Heath Ledger becoming the first person (to my knowledge) to win an Oscar for portraying a comic book villain. We're all thinking it, but let it never be said that he would not have won had he still been with us. The performance is incredible, all on its own.
Kate Winslet finaly getting a statue on her sixth nomination.
A film inspired and influenced by the Bollywood tradition recognized as the best of the year, and a couple amazing musical performances therefrom.
Seriously impressive star power handing out the awards.

I need something to throw at the TV:
Benjamin Button inexplicably taking away the special effects and makeup awards from fantastic action movies like The Dark Knight, Ironman, and Hellboy II.
The Dark Knight getting no looks for real awards like Cinematography, Writing, Directing and Best Picture. This year pretty much sucked. Batman was one of the best movies made, period.
Cheesy blast-from-the-past filler clips.

Even Hugh Jackman was hit and miss, morphing from pleasantly funny during the opening into stunningly dull through the rest, as presenter after presenter demonstrated how much better they would have been as a host. Will Smith, Ben Stiller and Jack Black deserve serious consideration. Throw in Anne Hathaway, Owen Wilson, or Reese Witherspoon as dark horses.

Okay, what else.

We've already received notice from Canada that I have been approved as a worthy sponsor for Michelle's permanent residency. Basically, the application consists of two parts; my application to sponsor her, and her application to become a permanent resident. Phase one of the process is complete, and the application now moves from Ontario to the Canadian embassy in Buffalo, NY for the processing of Michelle's application. Part two will take longer, and may or may not include requests for more information or an interview. We'll see.

Toby is about to turn five, and, as usual, started acting like it weeks ago. His party is on Sunday, with a good seven or eight of his friends getting dropped off by their parents for an afternoon of Lego Agent fun. Our kids generally get to pick their party themes. Watch for pictures...apparently I'm somehow going to create a Lego Agent Piñata for the occasion.

And let's not forget Alicia, whose latest game is to borrow my wallet, take out each dollar bill, credit card, or other miscellaneous item one by one, then wear it on her head as a hat.

When she's done she hands me back the wallet, then each article which she has removed for me to put back in, one by one.

When she's not doing that, Alicia is still a great dancer. One year ago we posted this video. Just look at her now.

Self-Righteous Indignation, part II

2009-02-18T19:05:00.003-08:00

Regular followers of this blog could consider this post a sequel to the Catholic school post. As a further example of our occasional moral outrage against the surprisingly mundane, we offer this puzzle, which Michelle recently picked up at a secondhand sale.

The puzzle shows a rough map of the world, with playful, light-hearted illustrations of the people and animals who live in various parts of it. Alicia, a puzzle addict, had probably assembled it several times before I noticed one particular illustration.

"Have you seen this?" I asked my wife, pointing out the machete-wielding, turbaned warrior on horseback right next to the "Middle East" caption. She hadn't. The puzzle was in the trash the same night.

Let's hope so.

2009-02-14T07:44:00.001-08:00

"On Valentine's Day, the world changes into the shape of a heart."
--Toby

Alicia's First Story

2009-02-10T17:36:00.002-08:00

Now you can know that verbosity is a trait of all of the Josh Fuller family. Not a one of us is left out. Here is Alicia's first story. Today, while no one was paying any attention, Alicia began to tell a story about a baby in a hospital. I wisked her off to the office to record what I could. Admittedly, there is much that I didn't understand. I did my best. And I've never heard of "Mattie" before, but the theme seems familiar.

A cow jumped over her and so um. . . and I wanted them a throw down her, There’s a heart on you mom! Why is a heart on you? (Cuz Dada put it there) How did he put it there? I should take it, we should take it off. And put it on Zack’s, Bella’s [Valentine].

First they go to the hospital and said Hi little babies and then they go down the hill and jumped and . . .but she didn’t, but the baby didn’t fit on the fiddle. but on my so . .I’m sad at on the building they waited for their mom and they were not nice but when they had a fever they can’t go to her friend . . the other dad that was . . . come there for the cat for the hammer um so and said hello. And they she um so the captures but and now he wanted to get bad but he wanted to not get bad but I’m um so I wanted them to stop fighting and the were stop fighting but now and now I um get I’m most angry about they didn’t stop fighting. But he didn’t want to fight again, but they wouldn’t get tired of fighting the because they um said a big rabbit fighting um getting a girl for a baby. That’s what she wanted. And then she wanted to not be a baby because um she’s a big girl but she wouldn’t be a big girl because she’s a most sister and she’s not mommy because um said hello from you will not get to go downstairs anymore because you fight downstairs remember. Because I’m said don’t play downstairs anymore because I’m said hello don’t be bad I don’t want them to be frustrated because they fight downstairs. Take the blue ball away from Mattie, the blue Mattie. The blue Mattie was downstairs fighting with the captain with thirteen ears will fall off and they can’t kill them of course and they can’t fight them because she is my friend and because she is my captain and so she popped through the Mattie but then she questioned a car named a Patty crossed through the trap and a big big park because um why did she passed through the park and then she went back to her mommy because she was fighting with the captain and then she hit the captains face and I wanted her to stop and then she did it again and I wanted her to stop but she wouldn’t want to stop because I’m so and Mattie goed to the fair and buyed some apples with her mom.

It's not the end of my life

2009-02-06T18:35:00.002-08:00

Tomorrow I begin my next grad class. I've been on break for over a month now, and it's been glorious. I had a luxurious weekend away with my husband filled with lots of time to look uninterruptedly at each other. Except for those darn waiters. Ha! There was one restaurant manager who came to the table to ask how our meal was. He asked if we had any plans for the rest of the night. I should have told him, but I didn't have the guts.

Yes anyway. I'm taking 7 credits this semester. I didn't quite mean to. But that's how it goes. 5 credits consist of advanced linguistics and phonetics and phonology divided into two courses taken online. Another 2 credits is my research. Yes! And I'm loving it. I get to go to four 7-hour meetings in which a group of us are walked through the steps of doing research in our own classrooms.

And then I teach two nights a week. And I write curriculum for my class (which I'm paid to do). And I'm the lead teacher for my section of the program which means I hold meetings, write minutes, outline curriculum for other people, arrange speakers, make decisions, and get paid more than the others. This is all good. And I rock at it. Mostly. The next speaker who's coming, . . . I don't actually know her name or have her contact info. Hopefully I'm right about what she'll be presenting.

So, I'm also a mom. And I have great kids! Toby has been giving us riddles lately. He gave me one tonight and I wrote it down for you.

It comes in a box.
It's white and sugary.
It has corners.
It is the yummiest thing in the world!
(Toby, what letter does it start with?)
It starts with an I.
(ice cream?)
No, it starts with a 'sh'.
(I had no idea.)

Yeah, so the answer was sugar cubes. They are talking about the five senses at school and they had sugar cubes today.

Alicia has an ear infection now. It hasn't been fun, but now we have the meds, so here's hoping for a good night's sleep tonight.

Ooooh! If you haven't talked to me, you haven't heard me boast that Alicia is smart! She had her developmental test at the NICU follow-up clinic and she more than passed. She is 37 months according to her birth date but tested into the 40-42 month range for cognitive ability! For gross motor she was in the 37-39 month range! Yeah Baby!

Back to me. With school starting again, I bump into others' assumptions about my activities. The assumption that I find lurking out there is this idea that I'm doing too much. And is it my assumption too? I have, maybe, 20 hours of work to do in a week that gets tucked into nooks and crannies of time. I've been doing this for a year and a half now. I'm getting used to it. I know what I need to do to survive it, and I know where I stumble in it. Josh is well used to my rant regarding his ability to work during the normal day while I work in nooks and crannies. But it's my choice, not his. It's unfair of me to blame him. Well, I don't blame him. Is it unfair to rant at him?

What I'd really like to cut back on in my life is time with my children. How can I even say that? I 'say' it all the time, but writing it brings more guilt. But there it is. And what really bothers me is that no one else suggests it either. When I'm discussing my schedule and commitments, people may make negative comments about the time that a Master's degree takes. People may make comments about how it's hard to work at night. They may ask when I get it all done. But when they ask that last question, they aren't really wondering about the location of my nooks or my crannies. I feel like the question implies that I have taken on too much 'other than my children' work. Then there's the 'balance' question. I can't define why the 'balance' question is so offensive to me.

Ooo, and it also drives me nuts when a woman says to me, "I'm not really interested in getting ahead in my career." What the hell is that? An assumption that I'm working so that I'll move ahead on the pay scale or have more tenure? For the record, I get neither. I happen to like explaining verbs more than I like wiping bums, cleaning the kitchen, and coloring.

I love the work that I do. I love teaching. I love my students. It makes a critical difference in the lives of my students to learn English. It makes a critical difference that they have a teacher who is present consistently, establishing a classroom family, challenging them, being honest with them, and providing the best instruction possible. And I feel like I just kick ass at it.

I love working on my Master's. It's not a chore. It makes me think. It makes me feel proud of my ideas, contribution to each class, and contribution to my field. This is what I do. This is how my mind works. I don't want less of either of these. I enter back into my grad classes tomorrow with joy.

My children deserve to have a mother who is happy. My children deserve to have a mother and a father who kick ass in their fields. They also deserve to have a family who eats meals together, goes on outings together, and does bedtime together.

Eh. You know, I can hardly make decisions for the sake of my kids. I asked Toby what he wanted for dinner tonight. He thought about it and then got very excited. He wanted ham, peas, and pasta, just like two nights ago. Okay. No problem. We still have more of all the ingredients. I made it again. He ate two bites.

Life will be what it will be. My children and my family and I will all get what we get in terms of time, happiness, and togetherness. In the meantime, I need to do better at lining up childcare that allows me to work some during the day. And I need to not rant to my husband when I get too stressed.

See you in June.

Marked Man

2009-02-02T14:51:00.005-08:00

My drawings are making me a stealer. My drawings are also making me a fighter. I'm called a stealer and a fighter. I'm called a fighter when I'm fighting and a stealer when I'm stealing. And I also attack people and even fish with my friends. And that's what I do! And that's all that I know about me 'cause that's all that I do.

Schools

2009-01-28T18:10:00.002-08:00

Well, check off another box on the Moving To Canada hit list. Toby is registered for kindergarten in the elementary school one block away from my Dad's house. Alicia, she's signed up for pre-school six blocks away.

In our perfect world, we were hoping for Toby to make it into the French immersion program. We've been told he's number 30 on the waiting list, which is a long shot but not impossible to get in this year. The really good news is that he keeps his spot on the waiting list next year, and they will allow him to start French immersion in 1st grade (they'd call it Grade One up North). But for today, it was a thrill to get the news that he's in. It's just one more thing that seemed like it was a going to be a lot harder than it was. Selling the house, finding a good place to live short-term, pulling together the visa application for Michelle...well...actually, that last one was every bit as hard as I thought it would be, but now it's done and we can just wait for the answer. All that's left is whether I can find a job up there. Got any leads?

It's In the Mail

2009-01-21T17:43:00.002-08:00

It's kinda hard for me to even believe, but it's done. Michelle's application for Canadian permanent residency is all ready to go. It's in an envelope, nearly an inch thick, addressed and sealed and waiting for a trip to the post office. Inside are about twelve forms, filled out and signed, copies of both our passports, birth certificates, our marriage certificate, and originals of Michelle's medical examination results, background checks, our last tax return and recent paystubs, photos of our wedding, reception, and the eight years since then, and a handful of other odds and ends, and a receipt that proves I just paid the fee. Guess. Nope, higher.

Working on this was one of the reasons I wasn't blogging as much, so stay tuned to see if I'm back. For now, as my reward, the season premiere of Lost begins in eight minutes, and tomorrow morning the Oscar nominations are announced. How sweet it is.

Live Action

2009-01-10T19:06:00.000-08:00

I Don't Blog Much

2009-01-09T16:50:00.005-08:00

While I was in Canada, one of my faithful lurkers jovially chastised me for writing less these days. It's true. I haven't been able to make the time as often lately to record my deep thoughts and insightful observations. So tonight, I shall take the time to at least make excuses.

What have I been doing when I could be blogging? Lots...

Filling out forms.
We are getting close to having Michelle's papers in order to send in to Canada. It has taken up a significant part of my free time for the past couple months and I am looking forward to being done with it for a while. But on the moving to Canada front, there is more to be done, starting with registering Toby for kindergarten. We know what school we'd like him to be in, now we just need to call in on the designated day and hope he gets in. That day is this coming Wednesday. After that, Alicia needs a preschool and Josh needs a job. Stay tuned, we will post details as we know them.

Playing with kids.
Alicia is definitely three now, and Toby has been ready to turn five for some time now. They are at very fun ages for playing. Mama encourages a lot of art and creative time, and Dada likes games, Lego and general craziness. Alicia is always cracking us up with some cute turn of phrase. Just now I asked her, "Tomorrow is Saturday. What happens on Saturday?" She replied, "Monday!" And Toby continues to impress with his reading and powers of reasoning. But of course he still has an unpredictable sense of humor as well.

Reading.
For Christmas, my mother gave Michelle and me both gift cards to Chapters, pretty much the Canadian Barnes & Noble. We went, and upon returning I informed her that I had spent her gift card on a comic book. Her reaction didn't disappoint me, but then I explained that this comic book was named one of the 100 best novels of the 20th century by Time, called "peerless" by Rolling Stone, "remarkable" by the New York Times, "groundbreaking" by USA Today, and "a masterwork representing the apex of artistry" by Entertainment Weekly. Last night I finished it, so I am here now to tell you that Watchmen is an excellent book. It's hard to compare a graphic novel to the regular kind, especially since this is the first one I've read, but it's a damn good read. And it's going to be an incredible movie.

With her gift card, Michelle picked up The Time Traveler's Wife, which she has not been able to put down. She is constantly torn between telling me how good it is, and wanting me to read it as soon as she finishes, which she knows I will not do if she tells me too much. But I gather it's really good.

Watching TV.
I admit it. I watch more TV now. When we moved in October, we signed up for digital cable, upgrading from the most basic of basic channel lineups. We have a lot more channels now, which means I mostly watch more basketball. Cleveland is playing Boston right now, and looking very impressive. I'm also eagerly anticipating the return of Lost, and when Michelle has time we both love to keep up with Pushing Daisies.

And of course, there's the rest of life...keeping a larger house reasonably clean and in order, seeing friends, and trying to get out once in a while. Michelle and I are dumping the kids at Granny's next weekend and absconding to an undisclosed location for some undisclosed time alone. In this case, details will not be posted.

Auld Lang Mediocris

2009-01-01T13:32:00.004-08:00

It's the first of the year, so time once again for the annual list of movies I saw and their ratings. My viewing in 2008 seems to have been overly "pretty good." Lots of decent stuff, not much total garbage, but little that was truly great.

In case you don't recall from previous years, these letter grades are kinda sorta based on how well I thought the movie accomplished what it was trying to do, and whether it was entertaining. To earn a top grade, a film does not have to be an epic masterpiece, it just has to be really darn good in some way. Originality and great acting are my soft spots. And finally, these value judgments are absolute and unchangeable. Justifications are available upon request. So, in the order I viewed them, this year I watched...

1 - Bubble Boy: C+
2 - The Cave of the Yellow Dog: B-
3 - Sweeney Todd, Demon Barber of Fleet Street: B
4 - Madagascar: B+
5 - Slam: A
6 - No Country for Old Men: A
7 - The Pursuit of Happyness: B+
8 - There Will Be Blood: A-
9 - Pirates of the Caribbean 3 - At World's End: B-
10 - Mongolian Ping Pong: D-
11 - Vantage Point: B-
12 - Michael Clayton: B+
13 - Once: B
14 - State and Main: B+
15 - Grindhouse: Planet Terror/Deathproof: A
16 - The Postman Always Rings Twice: A-
17 - Elizabeth: The Golden Age: B+
18 - Born Into Brothels: A-
19 - Silent Movie: C+
20 - The Simpsons Movie: B-
21 - The Bank Job: B-
22 - Man of the Year: B
23 - The Kite Runner: A+
24 - The Jacket: A
25 - Iron Man: A-
26 - Transformers: B
27 - Ratatouille: B-
28 - Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull: B-
29 - Juno: A
30 - Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow: B
31 - The Barbarian Invasions: B+
32 - WallE: A-
33 - Atonement: A
34 - For Your Consideration: B
35 - Batman: The Dark Knight: A+
36 - P.S. I Love You: B
37 - Bend It Like Beckham: C+
38 - Gone In 60 Seconds: C
39 - Unchained Memories: Readings from the Slave Narratives: B+
40 - Hellboy 2 - The Golden Army: B+
41 - The 2007 Academy Award Nominated Short Films: A-
42 - Body of Lies: A
43 - King Kong: B+
44 - House of 1000 Corpses: B+
45 - The Devil's Rejects: B-
46 - Children of Heaven: B
47 - Madagascar 2: B
48 - In Bruges: A
49 - Cube Zero: B
50 - Muppets From Space: C
51 - Burn After Reading: A
52 - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button: B+

A White Christmas, and I'm not even dreaming.

2008-12-25T05:25:00.008-08:00

A very Merry Christmas to you and yours from snowy Vancouver, Canada!

As I mentioned earlier, we always love spending Christmas here. Usually the appeal is centered in the lively conversation, fun games and good food with family and friends that we don't get to see for most of the year, with a little warm weather reprieve from the Minnesota winter being a bonus. This year, however, we've arrived in the middle of the most incredible snowfall Vancouver has seen since 1997. A total of 14-16 inches has fallen in the last three days! That would be impressive in Minnesota, but not quite the unbelievable miracle it is here. There's a rumor going around that this is the first Christmas since 1971 for which the entirety of Canada has snow on the ground.

It also has snow on the roads, at least this part of it. Vancouver and its suburbs are not exactly well-equipped to effectively plow two inches of snow, let alone two feet, so driving is an adventure. But it's been a fun one so far, with no real scares. My brother Brad and his family (Stacy and new baby Kacia) were delayed at least two hours flying out of Vancouver yesterday, but they did land safely in Winnipeg eventually to spend Christmas with Stacy's family.

Our own travels on Tuesday were fairly smooth. The day ended quite late for the kids, but they did alright with falling asleep on the drive up from Seattle after the flight. Now, of course, Alicia and I are up way too early, our bodies refusing to accept this foreign time zone, as Toby and Mama sleep in to their hearts' content. The day ahead holds many presents, much laughter, food and drink, and hopefully a few little reminders of one very special Gift, but for now, only two creatures are stirring.

I think that's all I have to report from Canada on this Christmas morn. May the day be joyous and full of love for each of you.

My racist family

2008-12-22T12:26:00.002-08:00

Ah, what's Christmas without racism? Yesterday a gathering with extended family included explanations of where people of specific races live and what criminal activities they've been involved with lately. There was a comment about one of the criminals being "Obama's brother." It helpfully reminded me that it was time to leave.

Today, while my husband takes his afternoon nap, Toby is downstairs playing with a boy every bit as Kenyan as Barack Obama. Junior is Toby's friend from preschool. His Kenyan parents have not taught the boy Kiswahili, poor guy. Today Junior has been dropped off. It's a big deal. It's the very first time that a school friend has been dropped off to play. And this ESL teacher-mama couldn't be more proud that the lad is Kenyan. Okay, actually his parents have become US citizens and the dear boy has never been to Kenya. But still. He's a beautiful boy!

Pity Me

2008-12-22T07:28:00.002-08:00

Shaw once said that it was a crime to waste youth on children. Something similar could be penned about how much it sucks to be sick. You get a day off, but you're sick so you can't enjoy it.

You're also too sick to be all that clever in a blog post. But I'm still writing one. This was to be my last work day before our Christmas trip to Canada, but instead the vacations starts today, with me bundled in front of the computer/TV, my throat torturing me every time I swallow and my eyes closing from lack of sleep. I sure hope I'm feeling better tomorrow, but more importantly I hope nobody else in our family has to suffer through this during our long day of flying and driving tomorrow. Say a prayer for us if you like.

But no matter how badly it begins, this vacation is always a pleasure. Christmas with Canadians, warm Vancouver weather (okay, it's been unusually cold there, but still warmer than here), and the grandparents, aunts and uncles all marveling at how big Toby and Alicia have gotten and all the grown-up things they say and do now. But our kids won't be able to hog all the attention this year; I get to meet my new niece for the first time tomorrow. And there's a new stepdad in the picture too, with all of his side of the family to meet. Then of course, the usual board games, beer, turkey and presents. I can't wait.

Now if I can just keep down this piece of toast...

Snow Day

2008-12-15T18:02:00.003-08:00

These last two days have plunged Minnesota into quite the deep freeze, with today's high temperature reaching all the way up to three degrees below zero (that's 20 below Celsius) and a ten mph wind not helping things. But Saturday was a beautiful day and we managed to take advantage of it, getting outside and making a great snowman.

Had he stayed up, I imagine that the ensuing icy cold winds would have frozen our new friend solid, possibly preserving him throughout the entire winter. Unfortunately, less than an hour later while Toby and I were working on this cave...

...the snowman collapsed, presumably under the weight of his own awesomeness.

In retrospect, his middle section should probably have been his bottom, and vice versa. He was kinda bulky around the middle. I didn't want to say anything, though. I think the lesson is to be honest with your friends before it's too late...even if you just met.

Castle Battle

2008-12-14T11:37:00.003-08:00

If you know our son, you know he is continually telling stories. Sometimes, but not often enough, Michelle or I makes time to sit down at the computer and actually type one out as he tells it. We're collecting them in a binder, but today I thought we'd post one for you to enjoy as well.

* * * * * * *

Castle Battle
written by Toby

Once upon a time, there was a castle that's only a tower in the middle of the ground, and it was unfortunately in the shape of a square. And, there were all kinds of knights for years, and the one knight that was powerful forever, it will never die. Because it has a red gun with red bullets. Two red bullets, unfortunately. And, each bullet appeared in the gun.

And then he saw some bad guys coming in their jail trapper. And, very soon, right away, he got trapped in the dungeon that was on there. And unfortunately a knight from the castle rescued the door open. And the door went right down! But that's how it's supposed to open. And, only the evil drum warriors were tanned from a troll. And it was one of the toughest ones, of course.

Of course, they were bad guys. And then they saw something from a mine coming, from a catapult on their mine. And only the red dragon was not green. So the green dragon blew fire onto the Matik war ship. It was just like, "BLLLDLLLL!" went a signal, even though the vehicle coming with a dwarf inside was a helmet. Even though it was just a helmet. With wheels, of course.

And that's enough story, and then I drive a truck and then I turn into a knight and then I go to my castle. And that's enough story.

Post Party Protons

2008-12-08T17:33:00.005-08:00

I'm sure you've all played the simple game of Keep-The-Balloon-Off-The-Ground. Toby found out how to win.

Happy Thanksgiving.

2008-11-27T06:42:00.003-08:00

Mongolian Police Report

2008-11-25T07:18:00.003-08:00

Not to trump Alicia's party, but could you pray for a piece of paper please?

One piece (two pieces, actually) of my application for permanent residency in Canada is (are) a "report of no information" from the police from every country I've lived in for more than six months in the last ten years. So I need one from Mongolia (and from Josh's work).

I still know ex-pats in Mongolia. They have been working to obtain this document for me and haven't been able to. The police say that I have to appear in person. Even efforts to get this doc through the "back door" have been unsuccessful.

Now, it's possible that I can include a document with my application saying that I've been unable to obtain this needed doc.

In any case, could you pray that this would all get ironed out?
Thanks.

Birthday Bash

2008-11-24T18:21:00.010-08:00

Can Alicia really be three? Well, not officially until Friday. But you don't want to have a birthday party right after Thanksgiving...sometimes people aren't actually mobile again yet. Alicia's celebration was on Saturday.

There was face painting...

I think Zack did the best job.

Some of the kids painted their dolls' faces too, so the dolls got a bath afterwards.

Can't have a party without balloons. As it turns out, even balloons can be used as weapons by young boys.

And of course, the main event...

And doll-sized cupcakes for our babies!

The day after...Alicia enjoys her new puzzles...

And even Toby likes her new dress!

Introducing Kacia

2008-11-14T14:15:00.006-08:00

Late last night in beautiful British Columbia, a beautiful baby girl was born. Now Toby and Alicia have a cousin! And of course, that makes us a very proud Uncle Josh and Auntie Michelle. Welcome, Kacia Joy Fuller! And congratulations, Stacy and Brad! We love her.

Pronunciation guide: Kay-sha

I'm almost in too good a mood to be sarcastic. Almost.

2008-11-05T04:43:00.003-08:00

Four years ago, on the day after George W. Bush had been reelected, my wife and I were at a church event. A right-leaning friend whom I otherwise quite like and is still a totally good guy (not you, Brad, though you are also still a totally good guy), in what I considered a rather obtuse and insensitive moment, flippantly remarked to my genuinely distraught wife, "Oh, you'll thank us." It may be small of me, but I have not forgotten that comment.

$10,588,615,950,225: The US National Debt. Source.
2,000,000: US jobs lost in the last four years. Source.
$500,000,000,000: Money spent on the Iraq war in the last four years. Source.
2752: American casualties in Iraq in the last four years. Source.
61,356: Minimum number of documented civilian deaths in Iraq in the last four years. Source.

So now seems like a good time to say, "Thanks, Republicans. Thanks a lot."

We'll take it from here.

Lesson Learned

2008-11-03T20:14:00.001-08:00

If ever you happen to see a moving car smack into a parked car and then drive right off again, and you happen to see the license plate and think it a good idea to write it down, you might guess that the proper thing to do would be to call the police and tell them what you saw. You would be wrong. The proper thing to do is write down what you saw and leave it on the damaged car and be done with it. Now you know.

Can't Go Wrong With The Classics

2008-11-02T05:33:00.004-08:00

They weren't the scariest kids on the block, but as a firefighter and a fairy princess, Toby and Alicia scored huge points on the Cute Scale.

At Church of the Open Door, they got to play fun games and load up on corn syrup. And Toby ran into one of his heroes!

After the church event, we had a great time hitting a few houses in our neighborhood. Great way to introduce ourselves to our new neighbors!

I just hope they don't mind the eggs and toilet paper.

My student

2008-10-29T19:23:00.002-07:00

Most of my students are phenomenal individuals. To begin with, who would want to leave their country? Well, okay. But it is hard. Few of my students have connections here before they come. All of them are leaving family behind and won't see them again for years or ever. They don't fly home for Christmas. Or Ramadan. And they don't often cross the border just for kicks if they are illegal.

Last week Josefina couldn't come to class one night because she took her daughter to the hospital. Tonight I asked her how her daughter was doing. Her daughter is 18 months old and had a rash all over her torso. She got some medicine, and she's doing a bit better. Oh, but she's 43 pounds. I just have to stop after typing that. Josefina lives with her parents, who feed her children constantly. They themselves eat constantly as well. Her son is 8 and wears size 16. Oh I'm so sad.

It happens often that people who grow up without enough food to eat, later can't stop eating when there is money to buy enough. Foster children commonly horde food. There are other factors. Most immigrants gain weight when they move to America, no matter how wealthy they were in their former country. American food simply isn't as healthy as the offerings elsewhere and no one expects it. Then there's depression. Depression is an expected cycle in culture shock. And so many of us handle depression by eating.

I talked to Josefina about getting her parents to stop feeding her children. But she has to live with them. Her husband has been arrested and will be deported soon. He abused her, and this woman had the guts to call 911 even though her parents told her not to. She herself could have been deported. Instead, there is a woman who accompanied Josefina to court and will help her to apply for a visa since she has been abused.

Josefina comes to class without fail. Tonight she told me that when she came to class her first night, her face was still puffy from the abuse, but she decided not to care because she wants to learn English so badly. Her son needs her help with his homework, and she's doing her darnedest.

There's just no way I would have this kind of determination in life. Well, there was that time when I sat beside my daughter's box in the hospital, shoving my breast in her face till she stopped breathing. But, aside from that, I can't fathom what Josefina lives with.

I've also been pondering lately the effects of moving. Josh and I are crabby, but don't tell him I said so. Moving is unsettling. And, oh, that period of time where we were wondering if our house really was going to be closing and whether we really were going to be moving? Ah! Illegal immigrants are in a new country. Generally (but not always), they are unskilled laborers who don't speak the language. They are unwelcome. And they never know when they might be deported. Or, someone in their home might be deported. Perhaps the breadwinner. It's stressful. It causes depression. It's a condition ripe for abuse within families. And here's Josefina saying, "Damn it. I don't care if my husband beats me or what I have to put up with to avoid it, I'm going to learn English so that I can help my children."

God bless Josefina.

Point of View

2008-10-26T15:54:00.003-07:00

Okay my children, pretend that you are talking to someone who has never seen your new house before. Tell me about your house.

A: I want to go to the office. a computer (what else is in the office?) chocolate in the office.

T: There's a poster on the door. There's a giant basement. There are closets everywhere. And there's only one giant scorpion cave and a there's a shadow knight's castle.

What is the best thing about the new house?

A: The office.

T: Running around in the basement and saying, "Ah! A giant scorpion!"

Are there some things in the new house that we didn't have in the old house?

A: Yeah. Peacocks.

T: Yeah. Posters. A black couch.

Is there anything that you miss about the old house?

A: I miss the old house.

T: Um, um, no.

Do we have all the same things in the new house that you had in the old house?

A: Yeah.

T: Yeah.

What do you think that Dad might like better about the new house?

A: TV

T: Posters.

What do you think that Mom might like better about the new house?

A: Computer.

T: Peacocks.

What are you sitting on right now?

A: A black couch.

T: A black couch.

How long are we staying in this house?

A: Four.

T: For infidiby.

Who do you want to come visit us in our new house next?

A: Nana Nell.

T: Zack and Bella.

Everything Old Is New Again

2008-10-19T15:03:00.006-07:00

We are officially moved in to our new place, and loving it more and more with each box we unpack.

Stoop.

Entry.

Dining Room.

Kitchen.

Kid's room, Toby's half.

Basement.

Still more basement, viewed from where Alicia was in the previous picture.

Dad's office.

The climber we bought on craigslist yesterday and just set up in the basement today!

It feels like home already. Thank you so much, John, Tami, Diane, Aunt Margaret, James, Victor, and of course Granny and Papa. Moving Day was fun and fast thanks to you.

For those of you who remember the story of my neighbor Ted, I'll just say that Ted yelled at one of my friends to "Get the fuck out of here" when my friend got too close to Ted's van while helping me move. I have to admit I'm very glad that I will never see Ted again, but I wish him well and sincerely hope that he will someday achieve the emotional intelligence of a four-year-old.

Thank God for new houses and new neighbors.

Gratuitous Cuteness

2008-10-19T14:52:00.003-07:00

The Night Before Moving

2008-10-17T18:39:00.003-07:00

I'm sitting here blogging while my husband is packing. Moving is a good time to be married to my husband. I don't suppose I need to say more about that.

I'm thinking about how I visited my dad every week growing up. How that must have made it easier for me to move. How I've had pride in my lack of concern for roots. The five and a half years I've lived in this house is the longest single period of time in my life that I've really been in one place. And I chuckle; when we first moved in here I said that I would only live here for five years. I couldn't conceive of living in one place longer than that.

So why do I care so strongly that we're moving? I even hate our neighbors, and I don't generally hate anyone.

Partially, it's because we've done everything to this house now and I like it this way. All of our appliances are newer than the ones in the house we're renting. I won't have my water purifier on the sink or even a water softener. I just learned today that the only phone jack in the house appears to be in the master bedroom! What? It wasn't built in the age of cell phones or anything. But that's all just complaining.

There's also the memory factor. I got sappy with Toby today and was recounting some of those with him. I pointed in the kitchen and told him that right there he took his first steps toward Tami. I held him on the couch and told him how we would take naps together right there in the living room when he was a baby.

I won't be sappy tomorrow, though. Just tired. And a bit pissy when things in the new house aren't like things in the old. The neighbors, though. The neighbors will be better.

Never confuse movement with action.

2008-10-13T17:56:00.001-07:00

I have not blogged for 24 days. That may be a good thing, since the last thing the world needs is another blog which goes on and on about how pathetic this campaign has become, or regular updates on how many boxes we've packed and how much we're looking forward to seeing you on Saturday at 9am to help us move. And it's certainly a good thing that I've actually been packing boxes instead of writing about it.

So why now, five days before this impending move, am I taking the time to blog? Well, for one thing, I was ordered not to pack anything tonight. There was a good reason for that, and this blog post was going to be about that reason. But things change fast sometimes, especially after they have moved at a snail's pace for weeks.

Our closing was scheduled, a few weeks ago, for Monday the 20th, with our buyers taking possession on that day. So we wanted to be out the weekend before, obviously. And we have made great efforts to be ready to do that, including arranging for our utilities to be terminated or transferred to the new location, as well as the packing. Our house was inspected and we made a few minor improvements in order to be sure we were up to code. And all the while, we've been waiting for our buyers' mortgage company to have the house appraised so that they can get all their ducks in some sort of pile too. Conventional wisdom is, the appraisal has to be done at least a week before closing in order for everything to wrap up smoothly.

Yeah, that would be today.

So as we've waited, hearing nothing, occasionally being vaguely assured by our Realtor (for Jenell) that everything is fine, we've started to wonder what happens if the closing gets pushed out. How long are we talking about? Should we still move this weekend, if this is still our house for another few weeks? Months? Is this the first sign that our buyers' bank is actually going bankrupt and our sale is not going to happen at all? Are we going to end up stuck in this house, out two and a half months' rent with no recourse? And why did we have to put up two and a half months' rent in advance anyway? Isn't it usually just two at the most?

That's what I was going to write a blog post about. But about an hour ago, Re/Max called and scheduled the appraisal for tomorrow. So it looks like we'll be alright.

So thank you to everyone who prayed that our sale would happen. Thank you to the people who prayed that Michelle would not go insane. And a special thanks to everyone who will be here on Saturday for the fun part.

So What the Heck Are We Doing?

2008-09-19T18:43:00.002-07:00

Okay. Things are moving fast now, so as bloggers it may be tough for us to keep up with ourselves. But what exactly are we up to, you may be wondering? Well, just follow this simple step-by-step plan and you too can experience the excitement and fun of our lives as they stand at this moment.

1. Sell your house in one week. This is maybe not as surprising as it sounds, since we are lucky enough to be in a position to take a significant loss, but it's still quite a feat in the current market. Besides our low pricing, we probably owe some of our instant success to our stager, Julie. If you are trying to sell, our humble opinion is that it's worth paying somebody like her to come to your house and tell you how to make it look better. We can give you her number.

2. Once you've recovered from the fact that your house actually sold, find a new place to live. It's not that tough to find a good place to rent right now, since no one can sell their house (at least not without using a stager), but you are limited by the fact that you don't want to sign a one-year lease. We looked at four places in the last two days, and the fourth one was the one. It's awesome. We're excited. It looks like this.

3. Move. Specifically, on Saturday, October 18th. Be sure to put this date on your blog so that all your friends will come and help you. You might also think about making it into a Facebook Event that you can invite all your Facebook Friends to. And of course, you will be sure to be all packed and ready for them when they come, so all they will have to do is load boxes into cars and trucks and drive them to your new place...don't make them actually pack things or clean or anything not-fun like that. And feed them pizza.

4. Fill out several dozen forms so that you will be allowed to live in Canada sometime next year. Your wife needs to be sponsored for permanent residency, but before you can fill out that form, you need passports for yourself and your kids, and before you can apply for passports, they need to have Certificates of Canadian Citizenship, so you better get started because this chain of events will probably take months upon months to complete.

5. Explain to everybody at work that you are leaving, but not for nearly a year yet. This will create a nicely awkward situation where they might congratulate you and wish you all the best in the future, and probably start thinking about who will have to replace you when you leave and what knowledge you will have to impart before you go, but where they will still have to be around you and work with you for at least seven to nine more months and act like nothing is different.

6. Now is not the time to start thinking about this yet, but eventually you will need to start looking for a new job in Canada. This will create more enjoyable awkwardness as you ask people if they will be a reference for you, but also still work with you for another half a year or more. Once you have named a coworker as a reference, it is best not to then do anything to annoy them. The day after you piss them off will probably be the day they get a call from your potential future employer.

7. For Pete's sake, now is not the time to worry about your punctuation.

2008-09-15T20:14:00.002-07:00

I don't have a witty title. I'm not Josh.

So. Our house is sold. It went on the market a week ago. One couple looked at it on Saturday morning. They came back today at noon. They made an offer at 5:30pm today. Our realtor came over when I got home from school at 9:30pm. I'm going to have trouble falling asleep.

Now, if all of you praying that our house would sell would now turn your attention to finding a house for us to rent, that would be appreciated. We close on October 20th. Good thing I've gotten rid of so much stuff already!

Everything

2008-09-10T18:25:00.004-07:00

It's funny that not so long ago I was sitting here wondering what I could come up with to say on the blog. The past few weeks have been a little hectic and any chance to update you, dear reader, was erased, so now it seems to me that there's a lot to cover. I may start saying it and find that it's not that much, but at the outset I'd say this is going to be an exercise in cramming a whole bunch of stuff into one post, so grab a snack or use the bathroom if you need to.

My useless polls appear to have stopped working, but when last I checked my mother's wedding was the leader for what topic was most deserving of my attention, so we'll start there.

By the way, Michelle and I have been talking about commas lately. Normally I would have put one after the word 'checked' in the previous paragraph, but she says no. I'm just trying out the less-is-more comma philosophy for a while.

Back in August, Michelle and I dashed up to Vancouver for two days, just long enough to celebrate my mom's joyous union to a cool guy named Don. Unfortunately I've never had the chance to get to know him very well, but I'm sure he's alright. I could say something like, she could have done better, but hey, she's my mom. Just kidding Don! You're great!

It was something of a revelation to travel without children. On the plane we were just sitting there talking to each other, not having to think about when the last time any small people had gone to the bathroom was, or when we would next have to feed small people so they wouldn't melt down on the escalator later. It felt weird. At one point Michelle said, "It's the first time we traveled without kids in five years!" I observed that five years ago we hadn't had kids yet, so we couldn't really have traveled without them. Really, this was first time ever that we were traveling without kids. You know, who existed. She wasn't buying it. It's like the commas, I guess.

So in Vancouver, with no kids to put to bed on Minnesota time, we got to enjoy the full array of pre-wedding excitement and post-wedding partying, with a little extra time for catching up with siblings, brand new siblings-in-law, and future nieces. Oh yeah, and an actual wedding.

The wedding was great. Well, it was a wedding. You've been to them. They're all a lot the same, but this was the first one where I walked the bride up the aisle, so I enjoyed it. My brother Brad, looking almost as handsome as I, was on her other arm, so it was a team effort. We contemplated a high five after passing her off, but in the end we refrained.

One of the highlights of the reception, if I may say so, was my attempt to sing. I wrote even sappier lyrics to Green Day's sappy song, "Time Of Your Life" (which is actually entitled "Good Riddance," but never mind that), and performed it with my brother Derek, who was looking even handsomer than I. Most of the weddinggoers seemed to like it, or at least not to mind it terribly.

And yes, we also got to hang out with my Dad and his adorable daughter, my sister Brianna and her new hubby Caleb, my brother Derek and his new ambition to be a helicopter pilot, and my brother Brad and sister-in-law Stacy and their new fetus. So many cool people in Vancouver...really, it would be fun to live there...

The last story I have to tell about Vancouver is about driving back across the border to catch our Seattle flight home. First, the set-up. In May, when we went avec kids to Brianna & Caleb's wedding (why is it cool to say without in French but not with?), we got stuck at the border for two hours and missed our flight. Having that happen again would have been much less terrible since we didn't have the kids with us this time (should be a comma after 'terrible'), but we were instructed by everyone and their brother (except those whose brother was me) to go eight blocks north of the street which crosses the border and take a right, drive down to 0 Avenue (there really is a 0 Avenue), hang another right, and drive back to the border crossing where you'll just take a left and cut in front of most of the line. Someone will have to let you in, and even if you wait for 20 cars before they do, you'll have saved an hour or more if the line is long.

Well, sure enough, the line was long again. We had left ourselves plenty of time, but after much soul-searching and reliving bad memories, we took the shortcut. And this, I need to write about.

You see, I'm just not that guy. For one thing, I'm patient. I can wait in a line for two hours and it really won't bother me. For another thing, I don't suffer from the delusion that I'm more important than all those people I cut in front of, or that they just weren't in as much of a hurry as me. I have my faults (comma) but one thing I take a certain amount of pride in is that I don't consider myself superior to other people. I am on equal footing with my fellow man, even when driving. I let people in when they're in a lane they shouldn't be in; I give people the benefit of the doubt; I respect people until they ask me not to, and sometimes even after that I still try.

So you can laugh, but it was hard for me to cut in line. If I lived in Vancouver I would not do that. It was only because we had a plane to catch, and even then, only because we actually did miss the plane the last time. If we had cut it close but acutally did catch the plane back in May, I don't think I would have given in to my dark side in August. But I did. So to all the people waiting in line on 176th Ave that fine morning, I offer my heartfelt apology. And now my demons are exorcised.

But I'm not done talking yet. Oh, so much more to cover. Have you noticed the two times in this post I've mentioned the abstract concept of living in Vancouver? It's been mentioned on this blog before, I'm sure. It just comes up every so often around here, and each time we talk about it Michelle and I just seem to get more determined to make it happen. So yes, we think we have just passed the tipping point. We love our jobs here in Minnesota, and Granny Kapp is fabulous, and it would be stupid to try to sell our house in this market, but any other reasons for sticking around have been fading away lately.

So we're doing it. This week we cleaned like mad people (specifically, like obsessive-compulsive and possibly agoraphobic mad people) and got a realtor, which is pronounced with two syllables, I might add for no reason other than out of a sense of charitable public service. Our house is for sale. Again.

The plan, subject to change though it might be, is to be here until next spring or summer. If we get lucky and the house sells sooner rather than later, we will just count our blessings and find somewhere to rent month to month. The plan also involves looking for new jobs, getting three Canadian passports and one permanent residency, and, apparently, jettisoning hundreds of dollars worth of our extra stuff on craigslist. Seriously, Michelle has already gotten rid of videos, CDs, a crib, a dehumidifier and a stool, and there's at least half a dozen other items posted for sale already. Usually you do this part shortly before packing up to move, but really I think it's Michelle's favorite part and she's just thankful for an excuse to get rid of stuff. If she could get rid of stuff full time for a living, she would do it. Getting rid of stuff is a hobby of hers. She could list it in her interests on Facebook, if Facebook was one of her interests, which it isn't.

There may have been more I was going to write about, but I think that covers most of it. And Michelle just got home from teaching. Oh yes, Michelle is teaching again. It's September. We're all back on our normal schedule. That's something. Maybe not that interesting, but it's something. And now you know.

So what's been up with you?

They Didn't Get Their Singing Voices From Dad

2008-09-08T18:17:00.002-07:00

I haven't had a chance to write for a very long time, so there's a very long post coming. We're back on our usual schedule, with Michelle working Monday and Wednesday nights, so that's probably when I'll be catching you up on all the exciting events of the Fuller household (wherever it may be located) and responding to the results of my highly scientific polls.

But for now, Alicia singing the ABC's.

And Toby with his own version, featuring his favorite letter.

Another Question

2008-08-26T18:37:00.000-07:00

What should Josh blog about next?

His mother's wedding.
The Democractic and Republican National Conventions.
The Olympics.
Bodily functions.
More cute pictures of kids!

View Results

A Question

2008-08-26T18:31:00.001-07:00

Why hasn't Josh been blogging?

Nothing to write about.
Was in Canada for his mother's wedding.
Too busy working on Minnesota's new criminal fingerprint identification system.
Ego not large enough.
Too busy creating dumb online polls.

View Results

Symmetrical book stacking. Just like the Philadelphia mass turbulence of 1947.

2008-08-12T18:55:00.001-07:00

The Three-Weeks-Too-Late Movie Review

2008-08-03T09:47:00.002-07:00

If you haven't seen Batman yet and you want to, for Pete's sake don't read this.

Alright, that got rid of him. For the rest of you, let me say that I know you don't need me to tell you whether or not The Dark Knight is a good movie. I even know that I'm probably not going to tell you anything you don't already know. But please understand that I must write this, if only so I don't inflict my enthusiasm solely and directly on my wife.

So last night I saw Batman, and, I don't know, maybe you've heard; it's awesome. Big news flash. So why am I bothering telling you (besides what we've already covered)? Yeah, it's what I do, but more than that...I don't think I've seen a movie like this before. The only thing I can compare it to is (sigh) The Matrix. Pity the poor Wachowski brothers...tis the fate of the groundbreakers to suffer such comparisons.

Batman doesn't quite shatter any special effects barrier the way The Matrix did...in 1999 we had never seen anything like what The Matrix gave us, and ten years later it still defines the way big budget special effects are supposed to look. By now we've seen it all and Batman doesn't have that much that's new, although an 18-wheel big rig flipping back over front on an IMAX screen is something every male human should see before he dies. When it comes to story, The Dark Knight measures up to the Matrix in plot complexity, suspense, twists and turns, and the final climax. It also brings almost as much to the table in terms of pop philosophy and dark existentialism, if that's your thing. The examinations of good and evil, the ethics of telling the truth or lying to protect, the goodness in human nature, and what motivates a hero or a villain, these are nothing new for superhero movies, particularly in the last two years. But in this film they aren't soundbites, or filler between the action, or fabricated questions with an obvious right answer. There's some deep stuff here if you want it. This was also true of The Matrix, of course.

But what Batman has that the Matrix didn't is, in a word, acting. Or in perhaps a better word, pedigree.

We have Christian Bale giving us a very interesting take on the antihero. He was not born to play Batman, but at times he's so compelling he makes you believe for a second that he was. Of course, we have Heath Ledger's hugely celebrated performance, which I'll just have to come back to. There's also Aaron Eckhart, flawless as bad guy #2. The Matrix could almost keep pace with that...great work by Lawrence Fishburne and Hugh Jackman, and you've got Keanu Reeves being not horrible. But where Dark Knight kicks ass is the second tier. Matrix: nice work by Joe Pantoliano and Carrie-Anne Moss. Batman: Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman and Gary Oldman...three guys who could act circles around you in their sleep.

But Heath. Ah, the Joker. I've been walking around for months telling anybody who'll listen that the real challenge of playing the Joker would be to not be doing a Jack Nicholson impression. Heath didn't consider that his challenge. I apologize; I'm way off the mark. The challenge was to make the Joker a completely believable psychopath who could exist in our world rather than Gotham. The challenge was to scare the pants off you and make you laugh in the same scene. The challenge was to stand a bad guy up against Bale's unique Batman and have him not only measure up, but dominate every scene he's in. At the end of the movie, you think back on Nicholson's joker and you can only shrug and think, 'well, he tried, but...'

So if you're a fan of acting, there might not be a better movie this year than The Dark Knight. And that includes Oscar season in December. Heath Ledger is said to be a lock for an Oscar nomination, and while that's almost certainly more likely because of his unexpected death shortly after filming, his performance really is deserving notwithstanding. It's just that he probably wouldn't have made the cut.

But it's not just the late Mr. Ledger. I truly believe that this film has what it takes to be one of the five Best Picture nominees. Please understand that this isn't some Batman fanboy saying this. I watch the Oscars every year and I pay attention to what wins and what doesn't. I never thought I'd forgive them for 1994, when Forrest Gump beat Pulp Fiction and The Shawshank Redemption, and 1997, when Titanic beat L.A. Confidential, but last year they came a long way to redeeming themselves. Last year tells us that the Academy is ready to start giving statues, not just nominations, to the dark and interesting movies over the grand sweeping epics. And it's been five years now since Johnny Depp was nominated for playing a pirate in a summer blockbuster. Is it so hard to imagine hearing a sentence next February that begins, "The nominees for Best Picture are: Batman..."

I Demand A Recount

2008-08-02T12:50:00.002-07:00

Today Creative Kidstuff had a Lego Contest! Toby built this cool house...

...but it didn't win. We still had a blast though, and saw some really cool stuff that older kids had made. And we bought Toby his first Bionicle. Dad put it together, and we both thinks it's awesome.