iGod

From Bjorn's blog I learned of this site where you can chat with God. Here's my conversation with the Java Jehovah.

Me:
Afternoon.
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
Uh...I don't get a period; I'm male.
God:
I hear you. Me either. So is almost everyone else around here.
Me:
In heaven? Are you trying to tell me women don't go to heaven?
God:
I do not understand that allusion. No I am not trying to tell you women do not go to heaven. I'm sorry you got that impression.
Me:
Oh good. Thanks for clearing that up.
God:
Ugh. What do you really want to talk about? My pleasure.
Me:
Let's see...well, I am curious what you think about the Chronicles of Narnia movie coming out soon. Presumably you've been given an advanced screening?
God:
OK let's do it. Interesting. it is an interesting subject to me too. We have never talked about it before.
Me:
No we haven't. That's why I asked you just now.
God:
Are you serious? By "we" do you mean you and me? Oh. Hey. Now I remember, you asked me just. What did I say?
Me:
Yes, that's what I mean. As I recall, you said that we'd never talked about it before.
God:
This was not a yes or no question. Thanks for explaining it. Do you mind if I tell other people: said recall you said that we d never talked about it.
Me:
No, tell anyone you like. In fact I wouldn't complain at all if you spoke more distinctly to folks here on earth more frequently
God:
OK then I will add it to my gossip files. OK I will tell them when I see 'em. Is that a fact. No one says you have to.
Me:
Unless you meant people up there in heaven with you.
God:
Maybe. Thanks for the information: said I meant people up there in heaven with you.
Me:
You're rather difficult to understand. Is your grammar of a higher, more heavenly sort, too wonderful for mortals to fully comprehend?
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am difficult to understand. Is my grammar of a higher more heavenly sort too wonderful for mortals to fully comprehend? I don't know.
Me:
Although that's the best answer you've yet given me about anything, I find it somewhat disappointing.
God:
Oh. Yes it is one of the best answer me have yet given you about anything you find it somewhat disappointing.
Me:
Now you're just repeating back to me what I said.

To this God made no reply. In fact, the website froze up.

But I think God may have been trying to get a point across. When I talk to God, I should be listening carefully to what I say. Perhaps the questions we ask are more important than the answers we seek. Perhaps, if we can pause long enough to hear ourselves as God hears us, we will learn to ask better questions. Or move beyond asking questions to something better.

But it is equally likely that God meant no such thing and I just made it all up. Judge for yourself.